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Acknowledgments xi
Introduction 1
Ribs 7
How to Smoke Your Butt 22
BBQ Beans, Texas Toast, and the Inevitable Mel Brooks Reference 27
Breakfast as a Mind-Altering Drug 38
Chicken-Fried Rib Eye on A Huge Biscuit 48
Grease Burgers 54
Corn Bread and Navy Beans 60
Turducken: Flight of the Hindenbird 68
Aged Prime Steak Cooked on a Propane Griddle 79
Champagne Chicken with Fettuccine in Cream Sauce 90
Smoked Pork and Andouille Jambalaya 98
Pizzeria-Style Baked Ziti with Sausage and Mozzarella 103
Stuffed Hog with Apricot and Marsala Glaze 115
Unauthentic White Anglo-Saxon Protestant Chili 125
Super-Giant Fried Patacon Tacos 134
Deep-Fried Chinese-Style Honey-Garlic Chicken 143
Rotis with Goat Curry 148
Doro Wat-Ethiopian-Style Chicken Stew 154
Hash Brown Casserole with Cheddar and Sour Cream 162
Dreadfully Fattening Macaroni and Cheese 169
Twice-Fried Fries Cooked in Beef Fat 181
Perfect 10-Minute Street Pizza 191
Peach Cobbler 208
Ice Cream Lasagna 213
Yeast-Raised Fried Doughnuts in Coconut/Banana Sauce 221
Coconut Flan 233
540-Calorie Brownies 238
Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Hot Fudge Dessert/Pms Remedy 245
Blueberry Butter Cheesecake 252
Cheese Baklava 264
Red Lager and Room-Temperature-Brewed Ale 269
Five Greasy Pieces 275
Conclusion 284
Index 285
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