FHM # 45, June 2004

FEATURES
66 QUOTE, UNQUOTE
KEITH OLBERMANN
Is it his fault that SportsCenter anchors feel the need to make up annoying catchphrases? (Hint: Yup.)
68 COMBAT
FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!
Because the only battles guys ever seem to win involve Real World and Road Rules alumni.
74 CARD SHARK
SHANA HIATT
Ms. World Poker Tour proves that the best part of blowing your savings isn't the complimentary, watered-down Scotch.
82 ENTERTAINMENT SPECIAL
COMING SOON!
'Tis the season for blockbuster films, fire-breathing transformers and tremendous facial hair.
94 THIS YEAR'S MODEL
LANDI SWANEPOEL
The folks at Guess aren't the only ones who want Landi in their pants.
102 FOOS!
ALL-PRO FOOSBALL
Evidently, there's more to table soccer than jabbing the pole into your opponent's crotch.
108 COVER CIRL
BROOKE BURKE
All eyes will be on the sexy globetrotter this summer as she makes her feature-film debut in Dodgeball.
116 QUOTE, UNQUOTE
CHUCK YEAGER
Breaking the sound barrier excuses the 80-year-old pilot's present-day curmudgeonry.
IN EVERY ISSUE
16 LETTERS
The hottest teacher, the hairiest feet and the coolest toilet we've ever seen. Plus, more superfluous nipples.
24 REPORTER
Meet a woman who could kick your ass and a woman who could out-eat you. Then play guess the butt.
51 REVIEWS
Slipknot gets a makeover, Saddam surrenders and Velvet Revolver runs A for the border—sans butt-drugs.
119 FASHION
Athletes get their kicks and average guys get sporty. Plus, windbreakers to break wind in.
142 GASOLINE
Watercrafts for finding buried treasure and splashing locals. Plus, Dupri teases the IRS.
148 MACHINERY
Enjoy summer as if you're on house arrest, with the best home-theater and patio goods ever.
152 BIONIC
Olympic decathlete Tom Pappas on how to win at damn-near everything, and fatties on how to lose lard.
ADDED VALUE
64 BAR ROOM JOKES
Remember these for when Uncle Charley starts unleashing those uncomfortable swinger stories from his youth.
160 TRUE STORIES
As long as men videotape humping animals, fornicate around their parents and inappropriately touch strippers, we'll have a page to share the pain.