FHM # 26, October 2002

FEATURES
70 QUOTE, UNQUOTE
FEDERICO CASTELLUCCIO
The Sopranos' ponytailed tough guy schools you in the ways of the Mob.
72 MODERN HORROR
COP GONE BAD!
Something to think about the next time your lady is out driving alone.
80 SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS
SEX LIES EXPOSED!
She says: "That was amazing!" She means: "I've had better. Goodnight."
86 VICTORIA PRATT
OUT OF THIS WORLD!
ALL genetic mishaps should result in women like the MutantX star.
94 BERSERKER
TOM GREEN
The zany stuntman is convinced that Freddy Got Fingered was a success.
100 KRISTIN KREUK
10 THINGS ...
... you didn't know about the sexiest resident in Smallville.
108 THE FHM GUIDE TO ...
TV TRAVESTIES
From Wonder Twins to Magic Johnson, FHM counts down TV's biggest failures.
124 COVER GIRL
ELISHA CUTHBERT
The daughter from 24 finally sheds that red top she wore all Last season.
132 QUOTE, UNQUOTE
DAVE ATTELL
He's on Comedy Central more often than repeat airings of Weird Science.
IN EVERY ISSUE
28 REPORTER
Claudia Jordan details life as a Barker Beauty. Plus, an eight-legged cat, freeze-dried man hair, face exercises for the homely and a man who makes a living cutting cheese.
53 REVIEWS
Become a Red Dragon–esque killer, die like a reggae star or turn your PC into a TiVo. Also, a month's worth of music, film and games reviews and the wise words of The Roots' ?uestlove.
135 FASHION
A bevy of new fragrances to help hide your natural rank and gamy odor. Meanwhile, those hoping to mask their entire body can choose from an array of casual winter attire.
152 MACHINERY
Massive TVs for those who can't afford to buy a movie theater. And then there are cell phones so advanced and multi-purposed they hardly even bother with phone calls anymore.
160 GASOLINE
Introducing the Smart car—good for intimate dates, bad for soccer moms. Plus, Monster Garage's Jesse 4 James talks about building a motorcycle big enough for Shag.
THE MAILBAG
22 LETTERS
Readers display their poor grasp of the English language, and one confident boyfriend sends in pics of his girlfriend in a bikini.
68 BAR ROOM JOKES
Punch lines so hysterical and mirth-creating they've been banned by several Southern preachers.
168 TRUE STORIES
Readers' memories of ridicule, topped by a hair picnic.