Maxim # 15, January/February 1999 Magazine

FEATURES
88 FREE LUNCH
CRASH THE SUPER BOWL!
Last year we gave four men a mission: to lie, cheat, or bribe their way into sports' biggest event. Here's the play-by-play.
94 TIME BANDITS
1999 CALENDARS
Tired of hokey calendars graced by images of starships. kittens, angels, and kitten-angels? Us too. Step right this way.
98 3.5 METRIC TONS OF USEFUL STUFF
MAXIM'S ROAD MAP TO EASY STREET
No doubt about it, existence is far too complicated. But these life-simplifying tips will leave you with the extra hammock time that's so important to your health.
104 COVER GIRL
BRIDGET FONDA
She swears she'll stop cussing, but that doesn't stop us from loving her.
108 LOSING OUR RELIGION
50 SIGNS THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END
Male synchronized swimmers, Shari Lewis' head, and foulmouthed Teletubbies add up to one thing: The world ends not with a bang but a laugh. Plus, an apocalypse puzzle page
118 BUYING GUIDE
SILK STALKING
Buying Valentine's Day lingerie is such a chore! We make it easy with a Maxim runway show. Also, commentary from real women about whether they'd wear it or wrap it around your perverted neck.
126 McFITNESS
MUSCLE UP BY MARCH
Men will fear you, women will love you,, and your health club will curse you for canceling after only 12 weeks.
132 SIN CITY
CONFESSIONS OF A STRIP CLUB BOUNCER
elebrity mayhem! Naked dancers! Mafia mischief! Naked dancers! Murder! And naked dancers—who are naked!
142 STYLE
HIT THE TOWN
Danny Musico, International Boxing Council super-middleweight champ, goes 10 rounds at NYC's hottest clubs.
COLUMNS
56 SAYS HER
WHY WE PICK ON EVERY LITTLE THING
Nancy Miller trots out her worst first date stories to make a point: All men aren't assholes, but women have plenty of reason to be suspicious.
60 BUCKS
A PALM GREASER'S GUIDE TO THE UNIVERSE
Creative tipping can score you cable TV, box seats at a ball game, and hotel rooms large enough to host a golf tournament—all for way less than an honest person would pay.
64 SPORTS
THE TOUGHEST MAN ON ICE
There are hockey players who cause serious injury, and then there's Tie Domi. John Galvin spends some quality time with the biggest butt-whupper in the NHL.
68 GRIND
EXECUTIVE SWEETS
You don't have to be a V.P. to bag corporate freebies. Here's how to get more perks than a coffee machine at an Alcoholics Anonymous convention.
151 WINE & DINE
FIRE STARTERS
When it's cold outside, the only thing better than a 100-prool drink is one that's also heated to 100 degrees.
152 POT O' GOLD
This fantastic recipe turns humble beef stew into a meal fit for a king. At least a king who can't afford lobster
154 STUFF
BUY THIS TANK!
Order a burger in a Soviet tank, direct traffic with an Israeli bazooka, and make a fashion statement at the next atomic blast.
DEPARTMENTS
32 CIRCUS MAXIMUS
The best rock-star rumors (well, did Ozzy bite the head off that bat?); how to foil a mob hit; and a new, worldwide sex survey that lets American men sneer at the French
52 TOY CHEST
Gadgets no grown-up three-year-old should be without
72 HANG TIME
Our cut-through-the-crap guide to the latest movies, music, television, video games, and books
160 INSERT CAPTION HERE
A contest to see if you're as sick and twisted as our editors