Reviews for Love and Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs

The average rating for Love and Respect: The Love She Most Desires, The Respect He Desperately Needs based on 2 reviews is 1 stars.

Review # 1 was written on 2012-02-28 00:00:00 Gian Edwards I read this book as a part of a small group of friends. I tried to enter into the discussion with an open mind, but I have to be honest: this book is terrible. There's just no easy way to say this: the author is a chauvinist. The basic premise of the book is based on Ephesians 5:33: "However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband." It built a case up for why women should always respect their husbands, regardless of his actions, and thus the husband will love his wife in return. In other words, women are to take the initiative. The author seemed to imply that if a woman does not show her husband his "due" respect, then she is to be punished by having love withheld. This is one of the most disturbing concepts I have ever heard. I feel that love and respect both have their place in a romantic relationship. Women deserve respect, and men deserve love. It goes without saying, however, that the woman will love her husband, according to this book. Nowhere does it mention respecting the wife. I really wanted to toss this book after only a couple of chapters, but I plugged away. I'm almost sorry that I did, as there was a chapter that referenced a woman that was in an abusive relationship and how she was counseled to show her husband more respect and his behavior would change. Again, I haven't read anything this disturbing in a long time. I do not believe that the Bible condones this whatsoever; if I did, I would not be a follower of Christ. This book has very little to say what Christ teaches on the matter (how He treated women as equals in a society that did not), and everything to say about Saint Paul's views (which, I admit, at times, border on misogynistic). I would not recommend this book to anyone.

Review # 2 was written on 2008-01-16 00:00:00 Christopher Rooney I have to say that I did not enjoy reading this book at all and would not recommend it to anyone. First, it bothers me that he bases the vast majority of the books basis on a single verse. The description for this book says that Dr. Emerson has done extensive biblical research on his proposed idea of men needing respect and women needing love. However, I see very little that verifies this claim. Extensive biblical research would show Dr. Emerson's thorough and careful exegesis of Ephesians 5:33, which would include the historical background, the verses (and even chapters) surrounding the verse, the background and point of the book of Ephesians as a whole, who wrote the book, why it was written, and who it was written for, as well as a look at the greek that the original verse was written in. That would be extensive biblical research, what Dr. Emerson did in this book, I'm afraid, is not an example of this in the least. Tying along with that thought, I can find no sources in the back of his book where Dr. Emerson credits the work of anyone else. Pretty much the entire book is comprised of his own research and inflated with lots of inserts that he has received from readers or people who attended his seminars. While that's very nice and all, it hardly counts as a credible source that would support his findings. On page 14 he says this: "The insight that I finally found in Scripture, and which I later confirmed from reading scientific research…" (emphasis added) What scientific research is this? Who knows, he never tells us! I find it very hard to consider Dr. Emerson's book from an academic standpoint when he only quotes his supporters and I can find nothing that any of his colleagues or others on the same standing as himself in the subject may say about his love and respect idea. Despite numerous other reasons for my dislike of Dr. Emerson's book, these two reasons are enough to completely discredit the book in my mind. Beyond these two reasons it is obvious as you read the book that the entire thing appears to be a huge infomercial for his seminars and DVDs, which is terrible. I continually get the impression that I am trying to be sold something. All in all, the book is a great advertisement and appears to be very effective in promoting Love and Respect Ministries. However, I believe anyone looking to strengthen their marriage or prepare to go into one look to other, much more credible, books. I personally suggest His Needs Her Needs by Dr. Harley.