Reviews for Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love: Solving the Mystery of Attraction

The average rating for Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love: Solving the Mystery of Attraction based on 2 reviews is 2.5 stars.

Review # 1 was written on 2010-06-15 00:00:00 Vivian Izer I think this is an essentialist worthless book and an epic piece of trash. Simply repackages stereotypes that are palatable to "traditional" Western values. Tries to prove through pseudoscience (aka bad evolutionary psychology) how ALL men are horndogs who are always ready for sex, and how women who actually enjoy casual sex must be damaged (have self-esteem issues) or been masculine (have high testosterone) and how men ONLY do *anything* for women ever as brownie points for sex, and how women are only interested their entire lives in long-term relationships and don't "really" enjoy sex for its own sake. Made many dubious claims which many of which were quite easy to debunk with a few minutes of internet research. (Such as their claim that there is a universal male preference for a certain hip to waist ratio but there are studies that show that in isolated societies (those not exposed to global media) there actually different preferences (so def no universal here). And its argumentation and logic was just awful, I remember one quote about women that said "But you know deep down inside its true!" No, that's not how science or logic proves anything, that's not any sort of an argument, just an appeal to emotion and prejudice. Also amazing how they simplistic attribute all this behavior to genetics and not at all to socialization. Also loved the part where they trashed those who criticize them as being "politically motivated". Got news for them, defending the status quo is just as politically motivated as anything else and probably even MORE politically motivated. This book was one of the most insulting things I've ever read claimed about human beings, as if we're not complex adaptable creatures who have wide range of variation and instead ONLY ruled by our genitals. This is so stuck in a black and white gender essentialist Western Christian framework, they probably sold so many books because they told people what they wanted to hear rather than what a sex researcher will probably tell you, something like "there is a very wide range of sexual human behavior and practices" throughout different cultures and times. Perfect example of when our prejudices get all wrapped up in scientific clothing but really don't hold to rigor at all. Or how the authority of science is used to try to uphold our prejudices (reminds of how 19th century sciences tried to "prove" the genetic inferiority of other races). Good question one of the critics of "men are horndogs and women are just emotional" line of interpretation of evolutionary psychology said was that if females just aren't that interested in non-monogamous sex than why did so many societies put so much energy into regulating their sexual habits through all of human history?

Review # 2 was written on 2011-07-28 00:00:00 Anasa Tawake Tawake According to the authors, our attitudes towards sex and love are strongly influenced by our basic evolutionary history and biological needs. Men can't be sure that any given baby is theirs (the book says that studies show that about 10% of children born to married couples are not the husbands' biological children), so they are driven to have sex with as many women as possible to have a reasonable chance of fathering children. Women, on the other hand, know exactly which babies are theirs since they carried and delivered them. What they need is a man who will be willing to provide food, shelter, and security during and after pregnancy. The authors don't suggest that either attitude is right or wrong, although they do apologize to feminists for stating their thesis so plainly. They do say that by better understanding what drives the opposite sex, we can make our relationships better. The book is written in an engaging and straightforward style, with very little scientific jargon, although it cites a large number of scientific and sociological studies of sexual behaviour and attitudes. A few cartoons and jokes are scattered throughout the book to lighten the mood a bit, but the underlying research is serious stuff. Based on my own experience, I would say that most of what the authors say is credible and sensible. I recommend this book to anyone in a relationship or thinking of entering into one.