Reviews for The Mistress Manual: A Good Girl's Guide to Female Dominance

The average rating for The Mistress Manual: A Good Girl's Guide to Female Dominance based on 2 reviews is 4.5 stars.

Review # 1 was written on 2012-10-24 00:00:00 Shelly Metcalf The best book on Femdom I've ever read, for sure, and one of the best on BDSM. Folks will probably say that this book is too specific - that it's heteronormative and focuses on too narrow a subculture of D/s. (Femdom IS heteronormative - that's kinda the point, that it relies on gender roles and archetypes in order to subvert them.) Me, I personally appreciate that Mistress Lorelei isn't trying to write about anything she hasn't tried extensively herself, and I find pretty much all the things she talks about to be relevant to the vast, vast majority of D/s situations - just replace your names & pronouns and it all works out pretty well. (I'm a queerDom who plays with folks of any gender identity/expression and have done this exact thing several times.) Even if you're exploring more "traditional" BDSM, I think approaching it as role play a la domestic discipline is a great way to suss out what to do and how to act, and being able to figure out what archetypes your sub wants to play out is INCREDIBLY useful. I would say that the target audience of this book is not people who are already interested in BDSM - it's more for those of us who came into it because, well, why not? Whether we're just trying new things or getting into it at the suggestion of a partner, those of us who came into kink without a specific mental image of what we wanted and who we wanted it from can sometimes find the whole process overwhelming, and if that's you, you'll probably like this book. Plus, let's be real here, this woman is a kickass feminist writer. She's not just writing about how to Dominate someone, she's giving you the tools to present (and hopefully eventually become) a more confident, assertive, empowered, ass-kicking woman inside and outside the bedroom. She's smart, articulate, and has thought of everything. If you've never tried D/s, this book might convince you to give it a shot - I've reread it several times and always come away feeling inspired and excited. The techniques and scripts are super useful, for sure, but what's also just as useful (if not more) is the attention to the sort of philosophical aspects of BDSM - how to figure out what your sub wants, how to figure out what YOU want, how to start and end a scene, etc. These are a lot of the "oh god what is this I can't even" questions I had when I first started to play, and still go through every time I work with a new sub. There's only one point I'll poke at, and that's something she brings up occasionally - the idea that talking to a guysub and telling him exactly what you're going to do as you set it up is a great way to instill fear and anticipation. While this may work better in domestic discipline roleplay, in my practical experience, the opposite is actually true - that guysubs are more tormented by (and therefore enjoy) NOT knowing what you're about to do. But that can also be trickier to negotiate, especially with people you don't know well.

Review # 2 was written on 2012-09-07 00:00:00 Steven Uchtenhagen I, myself, have explored the possibility of being a domestic dominant mistress and my husband loved the experience, to say the least! This book can be very helpful to couples looking to add more than just a dash of spice to their sex life as well as to women who are eager to discover and experience the intoxicating power that she can wield over men, or maybe even other women, using sex and her own sexuality. For the curious, the book will certainly make you want to take more than just a peak into the world of BDSM and embolden you to give some of the techniques described in the book a try.