Reviews for Contrary to Love : Helping the Sexual Addict

The average rating for Contrary to Love : Helping the Sexual Addict based on 2 reviews is 5 stars.

Review # 1 was written on 2008-02-13 00:00:00 Jeffrey Childers I don't what I could say that would do this book justice. For women who have read The Courage To Heal, it's a bit like that. The book is written by a man, written for either sex, and is pretty much straight forward talking about what is and is not sex addiction. Even then, you can't help but be left with the solid feeling that there is no judgement, only understanding and compassion, and tips on how to recover. There is a test, of sorts, inside, and quite a lot of mini tales, case studies, with patients. I was glad to see that this book could encompass the whole spectrum of sex addiction, from the smallest acts that seem to affect no one but oneself, to felonious and often horrifying ways in which this form of addiction can act itself out. The key difference that I got from the book was in deciphering whether or not sex was being used as a glorious expression of pleasure, however you like it, or is the intent in the sex act a form of escapism? Is it boredom, anxiety, stress, depression, whatever...? I had honestly never thought the line could be drawn so easily before, but once I read it, I knew he was absolutely right. Although I wasn't reading the book for my own issues, it did shed a lot of light on some major issues in my past, and gave me a hell of a lot to think about. I would recommend this book to any adult, really. Maybe even teenagers, although I'm not sure they would be able to grasp the subtle complexities of the issues and end up more confused than they were to begin with! He really pushes for a 12 step program at the end, and although he clearly explains what seems to be very sound reasons for it, I do wish he had offered some other sources of help and support for sex addicts as well. Still, a magnificent bit of insight into human sexuality, and how it can become incorrectly woven into the other issues of our lives. Brilliant.

Review # 2 was written on 2021-01-25 00:00:00 Alfred Dodson The second of Carnes' books I've read, this one is more geared toward people in the helping professions looking to help addicts overcome their addiction. While Carnes does go a little deeper in his explanations of the machinations of addiction, he spends more time on treatment philosophies and practices.