Reviews for Holding Hands Again

The average rating for Holding Hands Again based on 2 reviews is 3.5 stars.

Review # 1 was written on 2013-07-06 00:00:00 Nicolas Vincent Contrary to popular belief (and centuries of common-law precedent), child support today has nothing to do with fathers abandoning their children, reneging on their marital vows, or even agreeing to a divorce. It is automatically assessed on all non-custodial parents, even those divorced over their objections and who lose their children through no legal fault or agreement of their own. It is an entitlement, in other words, for all divorcing mothers and one coerced not from taxpayers (though they pay too) but directly from involuntarily divorced spouses. A legally unimpeachable parent minding his own business can lose not only his children but his property and earnings and can be incarcerated without trial through "no fault" of his own. -Taken into Custody, p112 That paragraph illustrates the main point of this book. 310 pages are devoted to further and interrelated aspects of the problem: a powerful bureaucratic divorce machine that benefits from encouraging, tempting, threatening, and in some cases forcing married couples to divorce -- and custody of the unfortunate children is the carrot/stick with which it gets its way. Wherever it involves itself, the father very often is treated as a criminal and soon finds that his constitutional rights have evaporated -- especially if he did NOT initiate the divorce. This was a worthwhile read, although the book is thick and I admit I did a fair amount of skimming. (The beginning of chapter six almost lost me.) I believe the author went out of his way to make sure critics couldn't accuse him of not backing up his claims; each chapter contains a multitude of material supporting its main point, plus footnotes everywhere. This makes for dense reading, and I got tired of being told the same story (as it happened to different people) multiple times. However, it's good that he was so thorough, since he seems to be bracing for opposition and possibly name-calling. (Can't imagine why.) Also, I suppose some Americans have a hard time believing that outrages like this can be taking place en masse. (The author himself addresses this.) As someone who grew up un/homeschooled before it was strictly legal, I don't have any problem believing that government officials can be quick to remove children from their parents. It almost happened to my parents (their defiance saved us), and it did happen to their friends. I never knew that parents -- and especially fathers -- are being so systematically gutted by "family court" systems. I have heard horror stories, and I know of men in my circle of acquaintances that have suffered terribly at the hands of their custodial and vindictive ex-wife. I did not know that it was such a common occurrence, and that I find appalling. It's saddening, too, to realize that the logical outcome will be eligible men "smartening up" and not getting married. Who would want to, if the most solemn contract one ever undertakes is in fact not binding? That IS fraudulent. I wish that the essential facts of the book were available in a succinct pamphlet form. I give it four and a half stars since readability was a bit of an issue.

Review # 2 was written on 2018-01-13 00:00:00 Jaime Ryan Heintz This book was a real eye opener. I had the idea that it was the men who ran off with "Tiffany" and left the women and children behind. Both this book and my experience is that there are so many more women who are leaving with the kids and the husband is left behind, often forced to leave his home, get an expensive lawyer and fight to see his kids. This book also presented the idea that "No Fault Divorce" is the only contract where one person can break the contract and force the other person to pay. The left behind spouse has to get a lawyer, divide his or her income, be faced with hardly seeing his/her own children and often forced out of the house he/she has paid for. There is something seriously wrong here. So often, the person who leaves has an unrealistic idea of what the future is going to hold. They see themselves as getting on in a new life and building a life with someone eles, leaving the old problems behind. Unfortunately, when that dream is crashed it is too late. They end up with vastly reduced circumstances, a more demmanding job to pay the additional expenses and children who are unhappy and very frequently having behavioral problems which take their lives in a totally different direction. This book is important for all fathers involved in a divorce to read. It is not just "the other side", it is a cost that society pays as well as the involved parties. No one would sign a business contract in which one partner could leave and not pay a penalty; and especially leaving the other partner holding the bag and paying for the default while loosing most of the assets. Divorce is costing everyone and society has a right to limit the behavior of people whose actions are going to impact it. This book doesn't say that there should be no divorce, but that "no fault" does not serve society or the children of these marriages.