Effective Apology: Mending Fences, Building Bridges, and Restoring Trust Book

Pleasantly lucid and immensely logical, Kador weaves some compelling evidence to assert his belief in the power of apologies and to support his five steps of efficient apology. Perhaps because of his rhetoric experience, Kador is an amazingly clear writer who provides handy anecdotes and delivers with unprecedented sincerity and conciseness.

Especially in Asian culture where face is important, Kador helped me realise that apologies are not only transformative but necessary. The fact that ego plays such a big role in obstructing apology is something that needs to be changed and Kador suggests why not take Gandhi's advice and be the change we want to see.

It definitely is difficult to admit mistakes, even more so offer a complete, efficient apology. Not in practising the steps that are needed (as Kador brilliantly shows, isn't all that difficult), but in confronting who we really are inside; to take apart a carefully constructed positive image of ourselves in exchange for a grittier, blemished self that is more in touch with our identity in real life. Apology helps serve as a bridge to not only restored relationships, but to a greater self-awareness in light of mistakes made and the values it espouses.

In all, I'm more likely to try to apologise and apologise effectively because of this book. I cannot say how much this book has changed my life yet, but I know that it definitely has laid the foundations for mending many relationships I have broken and restoring trust that was once breached.

PS: I want to thank my brother who has been so amazingly patient with me and who values our relationship over most other things in his life, as do I. I picked this book up because of that faith he has in me and and after the book, I really think I've a chance to step up and change for the better. Thank you for your honesty and your belief in me as an elder brother.