Touch Me, I'm Sick: The 52 Creepiest Love Songs You've Ever Heard Book

Love once inspired sonnets, plays, novels, and countless romantic songs. But romance can become obsession, and nowadays, love songs are creepier than ever. Even the Police’s stalker anthem “Every Breath You Take” is a popular choice at weddings and funerals.

In Touch Me, I’m Sick, Tom Reynolds offers hilarious riffs on 52 love songs that have gone off the rails into the realm of the tawdry, the overwhelming, the obsessive, the self-absorbed, and the completely weird. Including songs by artists as diverse as Melissa Etheridge, Michael Jackson, Paul Anka, Sinéad O’Connor, and Slipknot, he also pillories a handful of the 1,700 different songs called “Butterfly.”

Praise for Tom Reynolds’ I Hate Myself and Want to Die:

"A tremendous idea . . . Reynolds ameliorates the pain of having put his ear up close to some of the most inconsiderate despair anthems of our time by having enormous fun deconstructing them." —The Sunday Times

"Full of premium trivia and pinpoint pomposity-pricking, Reynolds has made comedy gold from the full base metal of misery." —NME

"An entertaining and well-researched set of cautionary tales music fans will enjoy. Consider the list a batch of enthralling liner notes for a box set that comes with razor blades." —Playboy

"Bridget Jones would love it." —The Scotsman

Publishers Weekly

In a follow-up to I Hate Myself and Want to Die: The 52 Most Depressing Songs You've Ever Heard, L.A. writer and TV producer Reynolds (thanks owed for Elimidate) assesses the queasy subgenre of pop songs in which love turns to obsession, ranging from The Police's "Every Breath You Take," to Fergie's "Fergilicious" to Michael Jackson's "Ben." In 52 admittedly subjective profiles, he talks breezily about the history of the song and performer before a guided tour through the song and an analysis of why, exactly, it's such a creepout. His sarcastic one-liners are hit or miss (MySpace jokes?), but his analysis is often thoughtful and vivid; "Every Breath" is "a ballad of utter loneliness. The lyrics ingeniously mimic the elliptical thoughts that fly around an obsessive's brain in mad loops." He's in no way above trashing a song he doesn't like or dishing dirt on those he does, but his brief, loud profiles can be unfulfilling. Other tracks include George Michael's "Father Figure," Air Supply's "Making Love Out of Nothing at All," Alanis Morssette's "You Oughta Know," Divynly's "I Touch Myself," and more contemporary chart-toppers like Clay Aiken's "Invisible." Like his last book, this should start many debates among pop music die-hards.
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