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Acknowledgments | 7 | |
Introduction | 9 | |
In 1787 the Founding Parents Drew Up the Constitution | 11 | |
President George Washington, the Parent of Our Country, Meets the Press | 23 | |
A Politically Corrected Columbus | 31 | |
Farmer Stone Meets the Victimized Devil and Daniel Webster | 41 | |
President Thomas Jefferson: Harassment, Heightism, and Sensitivity Training | 55 | |
Boston Harbor and the Drowning of Voiceless, Defenseless Herbs | 65 | |
A Dishonesty-Disinclined Abe Lincoln | 77 | |
A Height-Advantaged Tale: Paula Bunyan, Lumberjane | 87 | |
The Illicit Weapons Discharge at the Fairly Pleasant Detention Center for Hooved Animal Companions | 97 | |
Theodore Roosevelt, the Bullock Moose | 107 | |
Misjudged Nazis Attempt to Defend Their "Unique Culture": An Alternate View of the Second World War | 117 | |
Biographical Index | 126 |
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