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Introduction | 1 | |
Medical School | ||
Introduction | 4 | |
Stages of the Physician | 5 | |
Medical Students' Revenge | 6 | |
ER Stuff | 6 | |
Maggots/Magnets | 7 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Talk About Blowing It | 8 | |
Smudge | 9 | |
X-Ray Files: The Big One Here - Kitty, Kitty | 10 | |
Lord of the Rings | 11 | |
A Salute to the Barn | 12 | |
Medical School Mishaps | 13 | |
Why I'll Never Forget The Summer of '92 | 14 | |
A Medical Student Translation Guide for Patient Complaints | 16 | |
Synchronized Swimming | 17 | |
PJ Consulting | 18 | |
Millennium Stethoscope | 19 | |
Picket Fences | 20 | |
Bot Fly on the Brain | 21 | |
Respect | 22 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Perc or Drip? | 24 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Lymphedema Lucy | 25 | |
Moody | 26 | |
True Tales of Mistaken Identity | 26 | |
Anomaly | 27 | |
FUBIGMI | 28 | |
Make Your Questions Clear | 28 | |
Escapee | 29 | |
Everyone Needs a Nickname | 29 | |
Going NUTS in Anatomy Lab | 30 | |
Cracking (Up) the Code | 31 | |
Medical Memories from the University State Pen | 32 | |
"Well, don't come to my house!" | 33 | |
Night Stick | 33 | |
The K-Y That Got Away | 34 | |
The Surrogate Patient | 35 | |
Zingo! | 36 | |
Que? | 36 | |
MYAGRA | 37 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: I Could Sure Use Some Fresh Air | 38 | |
The Resident | ||
Introduction | 40 | |
Timing Is Everything | 42 | |
X-Ray Files: Drinking Buddies | 43 | |
Nightmares | 44 | |
Puzzling | 46 | |
"Get Me Out of Here!" | 46 | |
CYANARA | 47 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Armed and Dangerous! | 48 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Just a Stone's Throw Away | 49 | |
CHUX | 50 | |
A Sticky Situation | 52 | |
Trauma Alert | 53 | |
First Night | 54 | |
Pasta Anyone? | 56 | |
Ouch! | 57 | |
Bright Lights | 57 | |
Diener | 58 | |
Rub | 58 | |
UTERALL XR and PLACERTA LA | 59 | |
Potato Love | 60 | |
A New Year | 60 | |
Need a Bed | 61 | |
Now That's a Rectal! | 61 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: No Self-Defecation! | 62 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Rosey the Red | 63 | |
Digit of Death | 64 | |
New Medications for Smokers | 65 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Hamburger Upper G.I. | 66 | |
A Little Premature | 67 | |
Shrunken Head | 68 | |
Problem? | 70 | |
Sleep Study | 71 | |
Teachable Moment | 71 | |
The Wig | 72 | |
Nordart Contraceptive | 73 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Pheo, Phio, Pho, Phum | 74 | |
X-Ray Files: Throckmorten Sign with a Twist | 75 | |
PBJ | 76 | |
Are You an Investigational Whore? | 77 | |
Never Too Late | 78 | |
The New Doctor | ||
Introduction | 80 | |
"I Gotcha!" | 82 | |
Windy | 83 | |
Top Ten Clues | 84 | |
Just Can't Get Pregnant | 85 | |
Here's One Way to Beat the System | 85 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Laboring Over Her Pain | 86 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Paul the Popper | 87 | |
Language Problems | 88 | |
Voice Recognition Blues | 89 | |
Hot Diggity Dog! | 90 | |
Garbage Can Lady | 91 | |
Life on the Farm | 92 | |
In the Navy | 93 | |
"Committee" Committee | 94 | |
Too Personal | 94 | |
Out of Body Rounding | 95 | |
Make Money Naturally!! | 96 | |
X-Ray Files: Oral Hygiene | 97 | |
5 Effective Techniques to Help You Communicate with Pharmaceutical Representatives | 98 | |
Death by Moving | 100 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Clipping | 101 | |
Power Lunch | 102 | |
Lucky | 102 | |
Cameloft | 103 | |
Flatus Maximus | 104 | |
A Problem Patient Comes and Goes | 106 | |
Hairpin Curve | 107 | |
A Bad Itch | 107 | |
A Stitch in Time | 108 | |
X-Ray Files: Remote Control | 109 | |
Strike a Pose | 110 | |
Bill Millionaire | 111 | |
Scooby Snack | 112 | |
True Anecdotes | 112 | |
A True Diagnosis | 113 | |
X-Ray Files: Make 7 "Up Yours" | 113 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Insulin-Cravin' Sweet Teeth | 114 | |
8 CM - The Movie | 115 | |
Benzo Begger | 116 | |
The Timmy Fund | 117 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Have Stones, Will Travel | 118 | |
Top Ten Ways a Drug Rep Pisses Off a Physician | 119 | |
X-Ray Files: Butt Light | 120 | |
Scambien | 121 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Yellow Bill | 122 | |
The Experienced Doctor | ||
Introduction | 124 | |
PJ Explains the 80/20 Rule of Medicine | 126 | |
Doctor, I Can't Keep It Up Much Longer ... | 128 | |
Be Careful! | 129 | |
Top Ten Things Your Mother Always Told You to Do That You Wish Patients Listened To | 129 | |
Physician, Heel Thyself | 130 | |
PJ Explains Bowel Obsession | 131 | |
Top Ten Ways to Get "Hunkered Down" Patients Out of the Hospital | 132 | |
Back in the Day | 133 | |
New Doc vs. Old Doc | 134 | |
Here Kitty, Kitty ... | 135 | |
Indifferex | 136 | |
PJ Says: Suck It Up! | 138 | |
Cold as Ice | 139 | |
Creams Don't Work | 139 | |
The Doctor's Rules | 140 | |
Those Darn Narc Seekers: Jack 'n the Back | 142 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: Something Doesn't Smell Right | 143 | |
"Hear Today, Gone Tomorrow" | 144 | |
Let Her Eat Cake | 145 | |
Smelly Feet | 145 | |
PJ and a Barrel of Monkeys | 146 | |
X-Ray Files | ||
Bright Idea One and Two | 147 | |
Not So Bright Idea | 147 | |
COPD Terrarium | 148 | |
List of Bad Prognostic Signs | 150 | |
Answering Service Tips | 150 | |
PJ Explains "Why HMOs Can Kiss My Bony White Ass" | 151 | |
Hospice Tales | 152 | |
Godivaphage XR | 153 | |
Stand Up! Quick! | 154 | |
Radiology Woes | 155 | |
Learn to Talk Administralian | 156 | |
PJ Talks About ED | 158 | |
Case Records of the Placebo General Hospital | 159 | |
Official Physician Hand Signals | 160 | |
Are You Sick? | 162 | |
Oxycotton Candy | 163 | |
Thoughts from an "Experienced" Doc | 164 | |
X-Ray Files: Bolt - Doh! - Bird | 165 | |
War Is Hell or What's That Smell? | 166 | |
A 2 A.M. Phone Call | 167 | |
Duct Tape | 167 | |
Diary of a New Drug Rep | 168 | |
PJ Explains: Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em | 170 | |
Why Couldn't You Hate Me? | 171 | |
Alcoferon | 172 | |
X-Ray Files: Easter Bunny | 173 | |
Medical Brush with Greatness | 174 | |
Get Off the Road | 176 | |
Is It in You? | 176 | |
She Was Not Out of Earshot | 176 | |
Top Ten Ways Physicians Piss Off Drug Reps | 177 | |
Dementia Safe Invisible Fence | 176 | |
X-Ray Files: Hung-ry Like the Wolf Cookie Monster - Kenny | 179 | |
Things I Still Don't Understand After Being in the ED for 15 Years | 180 | |
Strategic Filibustering | 181 | |
Top Ten Things I've Always Wanted to Say to Patients | 182 | |
After 30 Years as an ER Doc: My Favorite True Stories of Medicine | 183 | |
More Than a Pen Whore | 184 | |
Gunpoint B#owjob | 186 | |
My Favorite Munchausen: She's No Coloring Book | 188 | |
Conclusion | 189 | |
Acknowledgments | 190 |
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