Mastering Mentoring and Coaching with Emotional Intelligence: Increase Your Job EQ Book

	Acknowledgments	v
	Preface	vii
	Introduction: What This Book is All About	ix
	From caterpillar to butterfly	ix
	Who should read this book	xii
	What is the book's subject?	xii
	Three developmental roles in business	xiv
	The book's themes	xv
1.	Figuring out what you want	xv
2.	Deciding what to do	xvi
3.	Making sure it happens	xvi
4.	The day after	xvi
	How this book is organized	xvii
Part 1	Starting from the Beginning	1
	Mentoring--some background	1
	The Lessons of Athene	2
	The mentoring attitude	4
	The history of coaching	5
	What can the sport coach teach us?	8
Part 2	Organizing the Mentoring and Coaching Processes	11
	The contract/agreement	11
	Integrating coaching in the HR strategy	14
	Seven steps to ensure an effective mentoring relationship	15
Step 1	Choosing a protege	16
Step 2	Connecting	18
Step 3	Outlining the relationship	19
Step 4	Getting to the bottom of it	19
Step 5	Concrete actions	20
Step 6	Following up	21
Step 7	Get out of the way	22
	Career acceleration	23
	Checklist: recognizing a high-potential employee	23
	Pitfalls of acceleration and their solutions	26
	Image of favoritism	26
	Time to prove	27
	Setting up a formal mentorship program in your organization	28
	Making the case for mentoring	30
	The push and the pull of mentoring and coaching	32
Part 3	Taking Stock and Moving Ahead	37
	Behavioral observation: what you are already good at?	37
	Self-assessment	37
	Calculating your score	38
	Interpretation of your score	40
	Expectations and how to manage them	42
	Confidence to act as if	50
	The presuppositions you want to have	51
	Developing compelling intentions: the itinerary of change	58
Part 4	Short-Term Mentoring Skills	65
	Listening and reflecting skills: how to make the most of what your protege tells you	65
	Communication skills: dos and don'ts of feedback in the mentoring relationship	67
1.	Building rapport	68
2.	Timing	68
3.	Form	69
4.	Flexibility of behavior	69
	DESC feedback format	70
	Self-evaluation	73
	The "Johari Window"	73
	Process: unstructured 360-degree feedback	75
	Perceptual positions	76
	From feedback to action	80
	Exploratory skills: asking the right questions	82
	Three rules for asking questions	82
	Dealing with emotions	85
	Systemic thinking	89
	Static and mechanical versus process and organic	91
	Structuring an issue	92
	SCORE!	92
	Discovering patterns	94
	People skills: generating enthusiasm and energy	97
	Creating challenges	98
	Adjusting the communication style	100
	Metaphorical communication	102
	Integrating your short-term skills: a coaching procedure	104
	The coaching form	108
Part 5	Long-Term Mentoring Skills	111
	A primer on values, work attitude, and motivation	111
	Meta-programs	114
	Values and culture	125
	The integrity moment	128
	Beliefs	131
	Thought viruses	134
	Along the career track	136
	The past	136
	The present	138
	The future	139
	Aligning the protege's mission	143
	Linkages between behavior and company strategies	148
	The spiritual level	150
	The changing workplace	151
	The balancing act	155
	Balance in time	155
	Balance across time	159
	Dealing with our shadow side	163
	Flow states	164
	Rebalancing	165
	Integration: Mentoring, a way of life?	169
	Conclusion: Well-Groomed Butterflies	171
Appendix	Mentoring and Coaching Treasure Chest	173
	Modeling project	173
	Conclusions	178
	Competence Versus Challenge	179
	How many options do you have?	179
	What can you do to increase your slice of the jobs pie?	180
	Framing skills: setting the scene	188
	Framing the encounter	189
	Preframing	190
	Some operational frames	192
	The meta-SWOT analysis	195
	The meta-octant consequence-evaluation system	203
	The Coach and the Fly	209
	The counsels of Athene	211
	Annotated Bibliography	217
	Additional skills	217
	Business books	218
	Self-help books	219
	jobEQ.com	219
	Bibliography	221