Love, Freedom, and Aloneness Book

Preface	ix
PART ONE: LOVE
Chapter One: Lovey-Dovey	3
Chapter Two: Real and Unreal—The First Step	6
Chapter Three: The Virtues of Selfishness	17
Chapter Four: Attached to Nothing	21
QUESTIONS
* Will you please speak about the difference between a
healthy love of oneself and egoistic pride?	28
* Why is love so painful?	32
* How is it that the inscription on the Greek temple of
Delphi says "Know Thyself" and not "Love	37
* How can I love better?	43
PART TWO: FROM RELATIONSHIP TO RELATING
Chapter Five: The Honeymoon that Never Ends	55
Chapter Six: From Lust to Love to Loving	59
Chapter Seven: Let There Be Spaces	63
Chapter Eight: The Koan of Relationship	68
QUESTIONS
* How can I know that a woman has fallen inlove in
reality, and not playing games?	71
* If the jealousies, the possessiveness, the attachment,
the needs and expectations and desires and illusions	77
* What is the difference between liking and loving, to
like and to love? And also, what is the difference	81
* There are many people I love but Idon't feel committed
to. How can I predict if I will love them tomorrow?	83
* Even if sometimes lovelike feelings arise in my heart,
immediately I start feeling this is not love, it is my	87
* In the East, it has been stressed that one should stay
with a person, one person, in a love relationship. In the	89
* Lately, I have begun to realize how even my lover is a
stranger to me. Still, there is an intense longing to	94
PART THREE: FREEDOM
Chapter Nine: Tabula Rasa	103
Chapter Ten: The Fundamental Slavery	109
Chapter Eleven: Beware of the Popes	121
Chapter Twelve: Is There Life After Sex?	128
Chapter Thirteen: It Takes a Village	137
QUESTIONS
* You said that love can make you free	But ordinarily we
see that love becomes attachment, and instead of freeing	148
* My boyfriend feels less and less like making love, and
this makes me upset and frustrated, even to the point	153
* My sex life has become very quiet lately—not that
I don't want sex or that I am not courageous enough to	155
* How can I know if detachment or indifference is growing
within?	159
* In your vision of a model society, would there be one
large commune or a series of communes? What would be	162
PART FOUR: ALONENESS
Chapter Fourteen: Aloneness Is Your Nature	171
Chapter Fifteen: Strangers to Ourselves	178
Chapter Sixteen: Solitary and Elect	180
Chapter Seventeen: The Lion and the Sheep	195
QUESTIONS
* Never belonged, never been on the "inside,"
never felt "at one" with another. Why such a	201
* Why does my sadness feel more real than my happiness? I
want so much to be real and authentic, not to wear any	204
* As I move deeper into meditation and looking into who I
really am, I am having trouble maintaining any	210
Caveat: Two Women and a Monk	213
Epilogue: Embracing the Paradox	233