The Two Noble Kinsmen (Arden Shakespeare, Third Series) Book

Oh boy, oh boy ... where do I even start with this? I have honestly no idea how to rate this play, so I went with an unmeaning 3-stars-rating. On the one hand, I hated this play and everything it stands for. It's one of the worst explorations of masculinity in all of Shakespeare's canon, and the way women are treated in this play is absolutely disgusting. On top of that, character consistency was neither Shakespeare's nor Fletcher's strong suit. On the other hand, I like how accessible this play was. It's so easy to follow the story and the premise is engaging enough to keep you reading. On top of that, I loved analysing this play. So ... where does this leave me? I don't know.

The Two Noble Kinsmen is basically another shit show in which two men fall for the same woman, then battle it out and at the end of it, one of them gets the woman. Albeit, at the end of this play, there's a twist (that literally no one could've seen coming) where the first victor falls from his horse and dies (#lmao), so that the "loser" actually gets the woman. So far, so ... not good at all. I've read so many Shakespeare plays and I was quite surprised by how often he features strong women in his work. Sure, there are often problems with belittling and abusing them (e.g. The Taming of the Shrew) or sometimes even raping them without consequences (e.g. The Two Gentlemen of Verona), but we are also treated to women who are smart, brilliant, absolutely savage and overall just well-rounded characters who get a voice.

Now, the reason why The Two Noble Kinsmen just annoyed me so much is the fact that Shakespeare and Fletcher fucked the one interesting female character that they had completely over. Yes, I'm talking about Emilia. Emilia is Theseus' sister, and the woman that both Arcite and Palamon have fallen in love with. At the beginning of the play we are introduced to her as a strong woman who is not interested in men. Loved for we did, and like the elements
That know not what nor why, yet do effect
Rare issues by their operance, our souls
Did so to one another. What she liked
Was then of me approved, what not, condemned,
No more arraignment. The flower that I would pluck
And put between my breasts'O, then but beginning
To swell about the blossom'she would long
Till she had such another, and commit it
To the like innocent cradle, where, Phoenix-like,
They died in perfume. Quite frankly, she even seems to be gay. The tone in which she reminisces about her childhood friend Flavina was pretty specific and more than just friendly ("That the true love 'tween maid and maid may be / More than in sex individual."). Furthermore, even when Hippolyta (Theseus' wife ... who is completely boring because she has no personality apart from her husband) belittles her and tells her that she is "weak" and that she doesn't believe her when Emilia says that she's sure she will never "love any that's called a man", because surely all women need men in their lives, Emilia stays true to her believes. Hippolyta even has the nerve to say that Emilia's loathing for men is really just longing for them. Miss me with that bullshit.

The reason I'm so mad is that Emilia, who was so confident in herself and in her beliefs (and sexuality), got, through the course of the play, reduced to the shell that she once was. As soon as she becomes the "prize" in the game that Arcite and Palamon play, she expresses her love for both of them, she muses about how handsome both of these men are and that she wants both of them to live. Excuse me? The woman who, a mere act ago, told us that there is nothing greater than the relationship between two women and who boldly asserted her beliefs when Hippolyta got on her damn nerves with her heteronormative bullshit: "I am not / Against your faith, yet I continue mine", is all of a sudden "a virgin flower" who must be "unplucked". EXCUSE ME????? A VIRGIN FLOWER? What's that supposed to mean, Willy? Pluck yo flowers in your own garden but leave my Emilia alone.

Furthermore, the two men vying for Emilia's attention are among the worst characters I ever encountered in all of Shakespeare's canon. The hatred I feel towards Palamon ... wow, I cannot put it into words. PALAMON
I, that first saw her; I that took possession
First with mine eye of all those beauties
In her revealed to mankind. Albeit Arcite was way more mature in the beginning, he, too, turned into a toxic asshole at the end. Emily,
To buy you I have lost what's dearest to me
Save what is bought, and yet I purchase cheaply,
As I do rate your value. Seeing women as possessions who can be handed around and be bought or won is just ... ugh, Willy, we all know you can do better than this??? So miss me with that bullshit that it was the time period he lived in. We all know that 15th century England was hell for women. Nonetheless, Shakespeare showed us in some of his works than he can do better than this, that he is able to craft interesting female characters who are not just objects and pieces on a chessboard. Peace out.