Devil's Cub (Alastair Trilogy Series #2) Book

Update: I found it a LOT funnier on second reading! I laughed from the beginning with "What have you done with the corpse, my boy?" "Done with it? WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH A CORPSE?!?!?!?!!!" to the end "Give Sophia a glass!! We're drinking your health!" "IT'S MARY!!!"

**Contains spoilers and strong language**

" 'They're all mad, every one of 'em,'"

That's what I thought at about 1/3 of the book, and then I decided to view this story as just a fun, silly screw-ball comedy.

And....I loved it. When I put Devil's Cub down, I was sorry it was over, and felt that I had truly read a masterpiece. Though the characters are particularly silly and irrational, and the plot exaggerated and totally improbable, it was a really good read merely for the humour and satire that Heyer seemed to have bestowed on the period. The whole book is so silly, in a way, that one wonders whether or not Heyer meant it as satire.

Devil's Cub is in no way a These Old Shades number two. It is in fact so different that I needed to adjust to the style of it before coming to like it.

The story can pretty much be summed up like this:

Duke of Avon: Vidal, what the heck son??? You can't just shoot a man inside the club when you're drunk!! Even I had more sense than that! Off you go to France, now!
***
Vidal: France sounds cool. Gonna take a chick with me. Twill be even cooler.
***
Sophia Challoner: OMG PARIS!!! I'M GOING TO PARIS WITH VIDAL!!!! OMG HE LOVES ME!!!
Mary Challoner: This is terrible… Have to do something about it, quick! *grabs mask* I will be Sophia!!
***
Vidal: Man! What the hell?!? You're not Sophia!! What are you doing here???
Mary: Are seriously such an idiot?!? I ain't letting no sister of mine getting ruined by you!!!
Vidal: Okay, fine, YOU'RE getting laid tonight!
Mary: *vomits*
Vidal: *holds a bucket for her*
Mary: ♥♥♥
***
Mrs.Challoner: SCANDAAAAALLLL!!!! Where is the Duke?? Where is the Duchess??? MY DAUGHTER HAS RUN OFF WITH THEIR SON!!! I'll make him marry her or I will ruin the Alastair family for good!
Lady Fanny: I swear if you don't shut up, you will be the one that's gonna be ruined!
Mrs. Challoner: How outrageous!!!
***
Lady Fanny: LÉÉÉOOONIIIIE!!!! We got the biggest problem EVER!!! That Dominic has run off with Mary Challoner!! If Justin hears of that he will KILL. EVERY. ONE. OF. US.!!!!
The Duchess: Voyons!!!! This is ridicule!!! Dominique is an angel! But don't worry, Monseigneur will never hear of it. I will invent an awesome lie. I'll just say I'm going to visit my cousin Harriet or something!
***
The Duchess: Rupert!!! Get your lazy butt over here, we're going to France!!!
Rupert: Waiiit. Who's WE!?!?
The Duchess: But uuuus!! You and me!! Remember in These Old Shades??! We had so much FUN!!!
Rupert: FUN?! Last time I went to France with you, I got a bullet in my shoulder! Now, what has that damnable son of yours done AGAIN!!! If anything, he will be the one shooting bullets at me!
The Duchess: Calm down, imbécile, he's just gone off to France with a Miss Challoner, whom I HATE, and now we're gonna go track 'em down and force them to marry and Monseigneur will never know, because if he knows he's gonna be so pissed, but he won't find out because even though he knows everything he won't know that because he's not here, so now off we go to cousin Harriet's!!!!
Rupert: .... !!!!
***
Vidal: Well, damn. I thought you where some kinda whore like your sister, but you're actually a devilish fine girl, and now i can't really do what i generally do to sluts, so hummm…marry me???
Mary: NEVER!!!
Vidal: Say that again and I'll STRANGLE THE LIVING BREATH OUT OF YOU!
***
Juliana: Omg my boyfriend is like, sooo annoying, like seriously I can't take it, gotta go out and party hard and flirt with every jerk I meet. Mary you stay here nice and quiet and see ya later!
Mr. Comyn: Mary, where's Ju??? Don't tell me she went to that party!?!? I swear, can't take her anymore, she's such a flirt. I'm going over there and tell her we're so totally over.
Mary: SHIT, I LOVE VIDAL, BUT I CAN'T MARRY HIM, OKAY!!!!
***
Avon: Hello Fanny! How are you?? I hear there's going to be some wedding bells!!!
Lady Fanny: !!!Gasp!!!!
Avon: I must congratulate you! Your daughter will be so happy with that Comyn guy, whom by the way I consider a very appropriate match for her! ;)
Lady Fanny: Justin…what the???
Avon: Ok, bye now, I gotta go.
Lady Fanny: Go??? Go WHERE?!?
Avon: Oh, just to see cousin Harriet!
***
Mr. Comyn: Juliana, we're OVER.
Juliana: FINE. I HATE YOU!
***
Mr. Comyn: Mary, run away with me to Dijon and let's get married!
Mary : *agrees so the scheme because marrying a dull dog like Comyn is so much better than marrying the man you love!*
***
Vidal: Juliana!!!! WHERE IS MARY!!!!!!!
Juliana: What the hell do I care???
Vidal`: I WANT MARY. NOWWWWW!!!!
Juliana: Well, idiot, go see if she's at your place!
Vidal: Oh. My. Good. Lord. SHE RAN OFF WITH COMYN!!!!
Juliana: WHAT THE FUDGE!!!! COMYN IS MINE!!!!
Vidal:Let's run away together to Dijon, that's where they went to get MARRIED!!!!
***
The Duchess: Where. Is. My. Son. Getting real tired of this shit.
Tante Élisabeth: *bawls* He ran off with Juliana!!!!
The Duchess: !!!!!!!!dammmn bitch! what about the other chick!!!
Rupert: Vidal is mad. Completely stark MAD!!!
The Duchess: You're mad, imbécile!!! VOYONS!!! Nothing makes sense!!!!
Tante Élisabeth: *bawls* They ran off to Dijon!
Rupert: LOL!!! Dijon!!! Why in the devil for!!! Dijon!!!
the Duchess: But crap, Dominique has to marry the slut girl, but now he's gone with Ju!! What are we going to do!!!!
Rupert: Kay, seriously now, why Dijon???
The Duchess: Justin will be Fu.Ri.Ous.
Rupert: BUT WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO GO TO FREAKIN' DIJON!!!!!
The Duchess: NOOOOBOODDDYYYY CARESSSSS ABOUT DIJON!!!!!
***
Juliana: You are the WORST douchbag EVER!!!!
Vidal: Mary didn't think so.
Juliana: You're nothing but an ASSHOLE!!! I'm gonna get the vapours!!!!
Vidal: Mary never threatened me with the vapours. Mary…
Juliana:Oh. My. Good. Lord. YOU LOVE HER!!!!
***
Mr.Comyn: Devil's Cub is coming!!!!
Mary: Ohhh nooo!! Shit!!!!!! Say we're married anyways!!!
Vidal: Mary!!!
Juliana`: I hate you all!!!
Vidal: COMYN YOU MOTHERF*CKER, GET YOUR DAMN SWORD AND FIGHT LIKE THE MAN YOU'RE NOT!!!
Mr. Comyn: Please don't come near my wife!
Vidal: DAMN YOU TO HEEEELLLLLLL!!!!! SHE IS MINE! MINE, DO YOU HEAR ME!!!!
Juliana: WHAT!!! MARRIED!!!! Getting the vapours for real now!!!
Mary: GUYS!!! Stop fighting!!! I wont marry anyone!
Vidal: AAHHH!!! I KILLED HER!!!!
Mary: I'm fine. Just wanna. Go to bed.
***
The Duchess: THERE THEY ARREEEE!!! FINALLYYYY!!!!
Rupert: Why is everyone in Dijon!??!!
The Duchess: Oh my dear Dominique!!! Listen now, my boy, you gotta marry that slut girl that I hate, I'm gonna arrange everything and Avon will never know exactly what happened. But why did you run off with Juliana!!!
Juliana: EWWWWW!! We didn't elope! I could never marry him!!
Rupert: Okay, but why come here, to DIJON!!!?!?!?!?
The Duchess: I wish everyone could just SHUT UP and explain one a time.
***
Mary: *runs away*
Elderly gentleman: Excuse me ma'am, you seem in trouble. May I help?
Mary: *tells him her whole entire life story*
Elderly gentleman: You are such a resourceful woman. I am a-ma-zed.
Mary: Oooh, but do you know the best part?! I got sick on the ship, and-
Elderly Gentleman: Bleargh, poor Vidal! I sympathize with him a bit now...
Mary: But no, no! He was awesome!! HE HELD THE BUCKET FOR ME! <3 <3 <3
Elderly Gentleman: Please STOP! We are eating and I do not want to get sick!!!
Vidal: Mary!! I found you….OH MY GOD!!!
Elderly Gentleman: Well, well, well.
Mary: OHH!! AHHH!! You are…you…you cannot be…..!!!!!
Elderly Gentleman: The Duke of Avon himself. But could you doubt it?? ;)
The Duchess: Justin!!! How did you know everything!!!!
Avon: Did 24 years of marriage made you forget that I am omniscient?
Rupert: AVON!!! We got the biggest problem, dude!!! There's all this wine I got from amazing Dijon but I cant afford it all!!!
Avon: Now, that is a REAL problem!!! But I'll help you.
Rupert: AWESOMEEEE!!! DIJON ROCKS!!!!

Okay, this is an ultra exaggeration of the story, but still somewhat accurate lol!


Dominic Alastair, Marquis of Vidal, it the notorious son of my beloved Duke of Avon, and the first thing that comes to mind when I think about him is dayuuummmm he's crazy!!! I found his character very difficult to like at first, for all his nonchalance, cynicism, and plain meanness. Then as the story unfolded he definitely grew on me, and although he became my momentarily favourite hero, he never equalled his father, because he lacked his polish and wit.

On the other hand, I loved Mary instantly, for she is a sensible, capable girl, and yet, we aren't given enough about her character to determine exactly how she fell suddenly in love with Vidal. I understand the idea, that good-girl-falls-for-bad-boy and opposites-attract, but it was so sudden when we learn that she loves him, that it kind of threw me off, especially since she keeps running away from him!!!! If I was given the chance to marry Vidal, AND that I loved him, I WOULDN'T JUST RUN AWAY AND DECIDE TO MARRY THE FIRST DOUCHEBAG I ENCOUNTERED INSTEAD!!!!

Honestly were was the logic in accepting to marry Mr. Comyn?!?!? I really did not understand that. I get that she thought that if Vidal did not love her, and she had to marry him he would make her very unhappy, because ohhh hummm, I don't know, he tried to strangle and rape her a couple of times, so yeah, maybe she had a reason to want to run away (even though I still would've married and tamed the shit out of him!) the first time, but to agree to marry Mr. Comyn?!?!?!!??!? Seriously, what the heck???? That would an even worse marriage than with Vidal!! I mean, Comyn is really THE ONE character that pissed the hell out of me the entire book. He was so irritating and annoying I just couldn't stand him.

To be perfectly honest, I would have rated this a lot lower had it not been for the appearance of the dear Duke and Duchess of Avon, and of the irrepressible Lord Rupert. They had the BEST moments. Léonie cracked me up and Rupert was so funny that I kept laughing at his lines long after I'd read them (and every one thought me insane, but whatever!). The novel is worth reading just because of them.

Actually, it's worth reading period.

It was awesome. It was silly, crazy, ridiculous, but awesome.

I love that part at the very end, when the women are chit-chatting in a room & are all so over excited about Mary & Vidal's betrothal and that of Juliana & Frederick, and all the men just slip out and go to another room to drink wine!! It was so typical!!

SOMEBODY TELL ME WHY THERE ARE NO HEYER MOVIES YET!!!!