My Goodness: Cultivating Decency in a Dangerous World: No Curfews, No Timeouts--No Violence, No Drugs Book

Foreword     XV
Preface     XVII
Introduction: Why it was important to write this book     XIX
Balance: A balanced life can prevent devastation and obsession     1
Boys Will Be Boys: Innate differences do exist between the sexes     6
Chores and Allowance: Not paying for chores encouraged my children to pitch in     13
Consistency: Consistency means getting up out of your chair every single time     19
Dinnertime Conversation: Dinnertime conversation stimulates thought and builds confidence     25
Empathy: Empathy is one of the most important traits to develop in children     31
"Everybody's Doing It"/Individuality: Being an individual circumvents the "everybody is doing it" argument     36
Example: Your kids are watching you. Be a decent person     42
Fear: Encourage cooperation and avoid egocentricity by using some simple tools     47
Food: Cook it, serve it, and they will eat     52
Freedom and Trust: Nothing is more important to children than their parents' trust     59
Friends: Peer relationships have as much or more influence than parents do     64
Grades: No money for grades can mean all A's     70
Humiliation: Publicly humiliating your child causes unnecessary and everlasting pain     76
Humility: Humility meansunderstanding that every person in the family is important     82
I'm Sorry: Love means telling your child you are sorry when it's appropriate     87
Letting Go: Build a closer relationship by letting your children go     93
Movies: Good movies, even some R-rated movies, teach valuable moral lessons     99
Music: Music, even angry music, can be used to release a variety of emotions     104
Overusing "No" (To Little Ones): Help your children learn that the people around them are affected by their choices     110
Overusing "No" (To Young Adults): Open up subjects for dialogue and give reasons why     116
Praise: Build confidence-not arrogance     121
Punishment: Negotiation, creativity, and cooperation lead to laughter and harmony     127
Religion: Make the search for meaning accessible to your children     134
Respect and Privacy: Space, time, and possessions-what belongs to whom?     140
Separation: Let your children benefit from what other role models have to teach them     146
Sex and Drugs: Start educating them early, and delay experimentation     152
Sleep: Parents have needs too     159
Start Young: If you start your teaching early, you can end your teaching early     165
Teach Them to Argue: Learning to argue teaches skills for success at work, home, and play      171
Conclusion: Give your kids the goodness test     176
Family Feedback: Husband, Firstborn, Middle Child, & Baby     181