Child Custody Building Parenting Agreements That Work Book

	Introduction
A.	Make Your Own Custody Decisions If Possible	2
B.	Parenting Issues and Financial Issues	2
C.	Why This Book Is Unique	3
D.	A Word to Skeptics	4
E.	So, You Just Want to Fight!	4
F.	Icons Used in This Book	6
1	Taking Stock of Your Situation
A.	You Are Not Alone	2
B.	Keep Your Parenting Plan Focused on Your Children	2
C.	Know That It Gets Easier Over Time	3
D.	Learn How to Negotiate	4
E.	If the Other Parent Is Absent	5
F.	If There Is Violence or Abuse in the Family	5
2	An Introduction to Parenting Agreements
A.	What Parenting Agreements Cover	2
B.	Advantages of Parent-Negotiated Agreements	2
C.	Goals of a Successful Parenting Agreement	3
D.	Parenting Agreements and Custody	4
3	Preparing to Build Your Parenting Agreement
A.	Organize and Review All Pertinent Documents	2
B.	Take Stock of Your Relationship With Your Children	2
4	How to Negotiate a Parenting Agreement
A.	Knowing What You Need and Want	3
B.	Understanding What Gets in the Way	5
C.	Using Effective Negotiation and Problem Solving Strategies	9
D.	Breaking Through Impasses	13
E.	Knowing Where to Get Help and Support	17
5	Building Your Parenting Agreement
A.	What Works in Building a Parenting Agreement	3
B.	Complete the Parenting Agreement	4
6	Parenting Agreements and Money
A.	Understanding Child Support	2
B.	Understanding Alimony or Spousal Support	4
C.	Negotiating Child and Spousal Support	6
D.	Dividing Jointly Owned Property	7
7	Making Mediation and Arbitration Work for You
A.	How Mediation Works	2
B.	Why Mediation Works	2
C.	Proposing Mediation	3
D.	Understanding Basic Mediation Techniques	4
E.	Why Mediation Works in Very Difficult Cases	7
F.	What Mediators Don't Do	9
G.	Choosing Between Court-Ordered and Private Mediation	9
H.	When the Mediator Makes a Recommendation to the Court	10
I.	Custody Evaluations	11
J.	Selecting a Mediator	11
K.	Preparing for Mediation	12
L.	If You Can't Reach an Agreement	13
M.	Alternatives to Mediation	13
8	Dealing With Changes in Your Existing Agreements
A.	Why Changes Are Necessary--And What You Can Do About Them	2
B.	When You Are the One Initiating Change	3
C.	When You Are the One Responding to a Request for Change	4
D.	When Tensions Are Running High	5
E.	What to Do After You Negotiate the Changes	5
9	Understanding Your Children's Needs
A.	Strategies for Your Children At Any Age	2
B.	Strategies for Your Children at Different Ages and Developmental Stages	5
C.	Strategies for Children With Special Needs	8
10	Multiracial, Multicultural and International Families
A.	Accommodating Differences in Child-Rearing Practices	2
B.	Encouraging Children to Celebrate the Traditions of Both Parents	2
C.	Sorting Out the Role of Power Within the Family	3
D.	Working Within the American Legal System	3
E.	Deciding If Another Country Has Authority Over Parenting (Custody) Issues	4
11	Nontraditional Families
A.	What Are Nontraditional Families?	2
B.	The Legal Relationship of a Nontraditional Parent and His or Her Children	2
C.	Recognizing the Nontraditional Parent's Role	6
D.	Resolving Conflict in a Way That Meets Your Family's Needs	6
E.	Creating New Relationships After the Divorce or Separation	7
12	State and Federal Laws Affecting Child Custody
A.	Custody and Visitation	2
B.	Best Interests of the Child	3
C.	Mediation	7
D.	Interference With Custody	9
E.	Interstate Custody Disputes	10
F.	International Custody Disputes	11
G.	Custody and the IRS	12
13	Help Beyond the Book
A.	Researching Legal Issues	2
B.	Researching Nonlegal Issues	4
C.	Research on the World Wide Web	4
D.	Finding Professionals Who Can Help	5
E.	Additional Resources	9
F.	Bibliography	11
Appendix	Tear-Out Forms
Worksheet 1	Describe Your Child
Worksheet 2	Describe Your Relationship With Your Child
Worksheet 3	Adding the Details
Worksheet 4	Checklist of Issues for Your Parenting Agreement
	Parenting Agreement
	Index