Singles at the Crossroads: A Fresh Perspective on Christian Singleness Book

Hsu's purpose in this book is to address an issue that he does feel has been adequately treated in Christian History. Previous treatments have often had distorted or fluctuating views of what it means to be single in a Christian context (ch.2). Also, at the present time, marriage and family is an exceptionally popular topic among Christian authors (10). Perhaps ignored in all that emphasis is a practical theology for the rest, the unmarried and those who do not live in families. What book is to be for them?

The problem is heightened, not just by the fact that the group has not often been the focus of the presses, but also by the fact that singles are not a marginal group. In the twentieth century the tenable belief that adult Americans were married and lived with their families lost its footing. As his chart shows, whereas the turn of the century boasted of a 95% marriage rate for adults, the waning years of that century would show a sharp decline in those numbers, only 53% of American adults being presently married (15). Singles, from whatever cause (whether never married, divorced etc...), now compromise a significant portion of the population. Though they are no longer a marginal group, a quick trip along the bookshelves of the local Christian bookstore ca leave one feeling as though singles have been marginalized.

Into this void comes Hsu's book, filling the much-needed role of speaking to the growing population of singles that populate our country and therefore our churches. Hsu sought in the book not to treat singles as though they were merely a marginal group within society. Rather, Hsu sought to treat singleness as a gift of God that is itself, whether permanent singleness or temporary, is a high calling on par with the calling of marriage as a place in one's life in which to serve the Kingdom.

Hsu's book makes several significant contributions worth noting. One is the recognition of the growing population of singles within the populace and the churches. In days such as these, when much focus is given to the traditional forms of family in order to combat the many intrusions that secular culture have made into the institution of marriage, we must not ignore that there are those who do not fit into that model of life. This is not to deny the virtue of the traditional understanding of marriage but to help the church minister to a growing number of individuals who are not at that place in life. Giving such recognition to these numbers can help ministers shape their churches to deal with such population dynamics.

Another contribution is giving a proper respect to the role of single individuals against some of the views that have been held throughout history. The church had at times viewed singleness as an escape from societal pressures toward marriage (38) and as a special calling, and perhaps over-exalted as such, to fulfilling an ascetic lifestyle (38-39). This was taken to an extreme to say that by a celibate priesthood singleness was the only appropriate way to serve God fully (40-42) but another extreme was taken against this position in order to say that marriage was commanded for all except in the rarest of cases (44). With a pendulum swinging between such extremes, Hsu helps us find a balanced view toward the place of singles and how they can serve.

Hsu also sought to dispel the myth of singleness as a gift. While it is truly a gift, it is not the gift that is often conceived on. Hsu reminds that both singleness and marriage are gifts that can both be used for service to the Kingdom. Both gifts are on equal standing and all Christians begin with the gift of singleness, not just a mythical breed of human that is free from sexual temptation and who only has a strong sense of self-identity outside of marriage.

Another contribution given by Hsu is one that speaks directly to one of the problems often faced by singles-loneliness. Yes, singles may often be alone, but this need not mean that they feel lonely for even those who are not alone can feel lonely. There can be a tendency to look back toward good times of school community in our youth or college days and to look forward to the possibilities of future married life. Doing so, though, does not respect the present moment in which singles find themselves. Singles can often only see the privation of past and future community without making an effort to build community as singles. This is often not helped by churches, which can focus its ministries on families with ministries to couples and to children, thus leaving out singles. For those in positions to effect such change, Hsu can prod them to be sure to include in the churches plans ministries that can utilize the freedom and opportunity that singles often have.

It has been noted that this book has had a longer shelf life than most books on the topic of families and relationships. Perhaps this is because Hsu seeks balance in his understanding of the nature of singleness. He is also strong on developing biblical themes on the subject.

If anything is lacking in the book, it is that it is often only introductory. This is not necessarily a criticism as much as it is recognition of the scope that the book strives to reach. Hsu pointed out that there are many types of singles, not just those that have never married. There are also widows and those divorced.

The book speaks broadly and seems most inclusive of that typical form of single adult but does not speak fairly specifically to those non-typical singles. A single mother, for example, would need encouragement beyond this, although she certainly may find some encouragement here. To her, to say that singleness is a time of great freedom and opportunity may seem distant since she has the responsibility of raising children.

That being said, it is necessary to note that not all books can speak directly to all people. It is a fine line, though, between speaking to one marginalized group and further marginalizing another. If a non-typical single such as a single mother or a seventy-year-old widow were to read this book, it would be a great addition to offer suggestion for further reading where they could find works that speak directly to them in their situation. Ministry is messy and people are in a high variety of places in life and no one book can hope to speak with them all.

The role that this book could play in one's life and ministry is diverse. For those who are single, for whatever reason, they can find encouragement and renewed purpose for their current state in life. It can also be a corrective for married couples that may have a distorted view of their single friends. They need to know that their friend, though single, is no less a servant of the Kingdom and can equally serve in their state as the couple can in theirs. The single is not necessarily irresponsible but is in that season of life given different responsibilities than those who are married.

For pastors and church leaders especially this book can be helpful. The temptation can be to guide the church's ministries toward families. Sunday School curricula can be written without thought of application to this growing population. They must know that there is a significant portion of their congregation that needs to be ministered to in this way.

Singles need not only be ministered to. They can also be effective ministers within the congregation. Pastors may even be in remiss of their duties if they ignore this group that has the flexibility to be involved in church activities in ways that married folks cannot. While pastors may tend to rely on the stalwart members of their churches, fathers and mothers who are raising the sorts of children that they should, those parents may have to be at a soccer game or helping the child in its education. The pastors must not forget that they have such a versatile and powerful resource with the single population of the church they lead.

Perhaps reading the word "fresh" in the subtitle can give an air of presumptuousness, but Hsu's book is truly that. This is not another turn toward the worn, well-intention yet erroneous sentiments that are often given toward singles. Hsu's book gives value to that time of life and recognizes that this demographic can be empowered to ministry work that many others cannot.