Joys of Motherhood Book

If Lagos had been a mistress (Ona), her lover (Agbadi) would have been the British, and had they produced a child, that child (Nnu Ego) would have been Nigeria. That child would have married her first husband (the British protectorate - colonization) but would have borne no children by him (Oluwum), so he would have abandoned her. She would have married again (post-colonization- Independence), this time producing offsprings with her second husband (Nnaife) and together, they would have fought to overcome marital struggles (polygamy, patriarchy and more). That is, if you were looking at this book through symbolic lenses, which, if you've read post-colonial writers like Wa Thiong'o, Achebe, and Soyinka, you'll find it difficult to avoid doing this.

However, the story centers around Nnu Ego, whose parents are Chief Agbadi and Ona (the chief's mistress and the love of his life). Though the chief has a few wives (the setting is that of a polygamous society), everyone is aware that Ona has his heart. Yet Ona refuses to marry him because her father will not allow it, and also because she fears that once she is his wife, she will lose his love and respect: "she suspected, however, that her fate would be the same as that of his other women should she consent to become one of his wives."So when they have a daughter, Nnu, Ona makes the chief promise to "allow her [Nnu] to have a life of her own, a husband if she wants one."
"He who roars like a lion."
"My sons, you will all grow to be kings among men."
"He who roars like a lion."
"My daughters, you will all grow to rock your children's children."
If you've already spotted the injustice within the dialogue, you've unearthed the limitations of the patriarchal society that Emecheta tries to showcase in her fiction. Don't be tricked by the title, for the story is not simply about the joys of motherhood, rather, it is an inquiry into the intersection of womanhood and motherhood, and the setting is a place where women are ostracized for being unmarried and childless.
I am a prisoner of my own flesh and blood. Is it such an enviable position?
In Nnu Ego's culture, a woman could be an ostracized lover, yes, but a barren woman, no. Reading along, you sense the subtle, but clear question that accompanies this ideal: why must it be this way?
But who made the law that we should not hope in our daughters? We women subscribe to that law more than anyone. Until we change all this, it is still a man's world, which women will always help to build.
I read this book years ago, but decided to revisit it after Thiong'o reminded me of African literary prowesses like Emecheta and Dangarembga, when I attempted his book, Wizard of the Crow. Emecheta is the author of more than ten novels, some of which are semi-autobiographical. It is alleged that she started having children at age sixteen and when her first husband burned her first novel after he refused to read it, she left and tried to raise her children on her own. While reading this novel, there were moments when I was reminded of So Long a Letter, and yet the distant narration and simple-sentence structure that relies on dialogue, is much different than the intimate first-person voice that empowers Ba's novel. What Ba does well in that book is address a reader who may not have a shared community, but shared values; a sort of universality that appeals to the non-Nigerian or African reader. The Joys of Motherhood is very region-specific, and although they were only sprinkles, there are words or descriptions that could prove offsetting to some Caucasian readers. However, there are important themes embedded within dialogue (something Emecheta does better than others), which makes me plan on visiting more of her works this year.
…If you don't have children the longing for them will kill you, and if you do, the worrying over them will kill you.