The Best Laid Plans Book

From Lynn Schnurnberger, bestselling co-author of Mine Are Spectacular! and The Botox Diaries, comes a novel of big secrets, family ties, and a reminder that sometimes The Best Laid Plans can lead to delightful surprises.

Tru Newman is one of the Upper East Side “M&Ms”—the wealthy stay-at-home moms who are into personal Maintenance and Mothering. Having been raised by a beauty queen mother who constantly picked on her, Tru loves looking after her investment banker husband, Peter, and their twin teen daughters. But her perfect world spins off its axis the night Tru throws a charity benefit and discovers that Peter’s been out of work for three months. Even worse, the family’s been living on a house of cards—specifically, Visa and Amex—that’s about to collapse.

Suze Orman tells Tru to “Get a job!” But doing what? When Tru’s best friend, Sienna Post, loses her position as an anchor on the local nightly news, the two hatch a profitable if illegal plan: They’ll open an escort service with “working girls” all over the age of forty. Modeling themselves on Carla Bruni (“after she married the president of France, not before, when she was dating Mick Jagger”), their smart, sexy, seasoned escorts become a big hit with a roster of thirty-year-old clients.

If only Tru’s legit life could fall so easily into place: Her husband’s new job has him working side by side with a flirtatious neighbor, her fourteen-year-old twins are competing over a two-timing, Clearasil-using Casanova, and after suffering a heart attack in her bodybuilding class, Tru’s hypercritical mother moves in with her. Not to mention that the gossip columns get wind that Tru and Sienna’s “temp agency” isn’t on the up-and-up—and the DA is on their case. 

But for the savvy and spirited Tru, these new obstacles bring unexpected benefits—from Geisha facials, to massage toys that are “better than chocolate,” to the realization that at midlife, she’s more comfortable than ever before in her own skin and more grateful for all that she has. By turns touching and laugh-out-loud funny, this is a must-read for every woman who knows it’s never too late to make a fresh start.

Publishers Weekly

Schnurnberger (The Botox Diaries, with Janice Kaplan) goes solo for a middle-age crazy tale of Tru--a stay-at-her-Park-Avenue-home-mom of twin teens whose husband loses his job in the financial meltdown--and glam sidekick Sienna, a TV anchor kicked to the curb for a younger face. The resourceful gals cook up a wacky plan to keep themselves in lipstick and lingerie: an escort agency specializing in well-bred over-40 "courtesans." It's a hit, and along the way, Tru competes to keep her husband; deals with her irrepressible mom, Naomi (a former Miss New York Subway), after her life-changing heart attack; and discovers her daughters are competing for the same wicked eighth-grade heartthrob. The multigenerational antics of this light, enjoyable romp are safely PG, as is the message: true love (or is it Tru's loves?) conquers all. (Jan.)