Men, Women and Relationships: Making Peace with the Opposite Sex Book

From the bestselling author of the blockbuster Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and What Your Mother Couldn't Tell You and Your Father Didn't Know comes this enlightening exploration of the common differences between men and women that brings valuable insights to the workings of male-female relationships.

Real love is unconditional. People are different. These are two statements with which most adults would agree. Yet, while recognizing that we are different is an essential part of creating a positive and loving relationship, many of us are instead intent on changing our partners so that they act and react more like ourselves. According to Dr. Gray, unconditional love is not possible without the recognition and acceptance of our differences. It is only through respecting and even appreciating them that we can eliminate many of the problems that plague our relationships.

Publishers Weekly

Men and women are alien species, writes relationship guru Gray in this 1993 forerunner to his bestselling Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus series, now in paperback. Women are emotional, subjective, relationship-oriented and like to talk about feelings, while men are rational, objective, work-oriented and like to withdraw into their "cave" and watch TV. The mutual incomprehension of the sexes leads to friction and conflicted relationships in which women feel neglected and unloved and men feel nagged and smothered. Rather than denying or suppressing their differences, Gray argues, men and women must acknowledge their masculine and feminine essences and learn to understand, tolerate and value the characteristics of the opposite sex. Men must learn to listen sympathetically ("make reassuring responses like 'hmm,' 'uh-huh,' or 'tell me more,'") while women must learn to give men space. Gray often pushes the essentialism too far ("Illness and disease are manifestations of the dark side of our female self") and treads lightly around issues of sexism. But many readers will see elements of truth in these behavioral stereotypes, and Gray has a perfect pitch for the ways in which misunderstandings can escalate into shouting matches and deep-seated marital bitterness. His is a hopeful message that troubled relationships stem from a simple failure to communicate, but it skirts the possibility that there might be deeper sources of conflict between men and women. (Nov.) Copyright 2003 Cahners Business Information.