She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Book

First, what annoys me about this book. There's a certain cheese factor to any "how to" book and this is no exception -- though the cheese is admittedly muted. More important, Kerner has a one-size-fits-all approach to sex. Different people like different things, and this is especially true of women. I'd couple this book with "The Guide to Getting it On," which beats it in tone (it's as hilarious as sex itself). The GTGIO emphasizes communication between partners. You don't know until you ask, or at least get nonverbal feedback.

Now, the good. Men tend to learn about sex through porno, which is kind of like learning about hunting by watching Elmer Fudd cartoons. In porno, women -- just like men -- love hard stimulation, and the male narcissus and woman's pleasure are fused. Put a different way, there really are no women in porno, only the male ego. This breeds in men a sort of fascination and repulsion of women's sex. (And, unfortunately, women often feel a sort of repulsion toward their own bodies.)

So, no surprise there are more reviews by women of this book than men. Women realize it's high time to learn about women's bodies, real women's bodies, and this is a good place to start. The non-readerly boyfriend can even make it through this book at half-times of football games. And even the readerly need to realize there is something, someone beyond the pages.

Women deserve orgasms, early and often. Everybody deserves good sex. But it's not something you are born with. Practice, study, practice some more, and worship at its altar. It's yours, Grasshopper. The mango is there.