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My Sister Jean

            
            Chapter 1  --  Jean's Panties


                  Holding up the soiled panties I'd lifted from the wash
            hamper and with an exaggerated voice of wonder, I asked,
            "What're these?"

                  My sister, Jean--older by two years--blushed and shot
            back, "You jerk!  What do you think they are?  Give me my
            panties...right now, Billy!"

                  Jean and I had always been close and shared most
            things, but the conservative atmosphere that surrounded
            things sexual in our home had placed a "forbidden" charge on
            things like underwear...and bathrooms . . . and (gasp),
            private parts.  Added to the mixed messages we'd received,
            was the clear awareness of our parents' sexuality, for, when
            my father returned from a long sea trip, they'd always "get
            it on." Ostensibly, their sexuality was not in the open, but
            in fact, they were careless and we were aware of both of
            them as sexually active people. But we never spoke of it.
            That heightened awareness was to add spice to our own little
            games.

                  Holding up the white cotton panties to the light, I
            examined the crotch in an affected fashion and said, "Hmmmm,
            what's this white stuff?"

                  "BILLY!  Stop that this minute, you little rat.  God!
            You're dirty."

                  I loved her discomfort and as her kid brother, I loved
            this fleeting moment of power.  Sensing I was on a roll, I
            held the panties up to my nose and made a loud sniffing
            sound and added, "Boy, this smells sexy."

                  Would this stratagem work?  I was dragging out of the
            closet a specific point of sexual tension that had been
            building between us for a long time.  It started for me, I
            think, when we were wrestling and I had become aware of the
            distinctive "girl smell" Jean had, seemingly coming from her
            bottom.  I'd wrestled in earnest but as usual, I was
            distracted. Everywhere I touched, it seemed, was soft or
            feminine.  She, on the other hand, wasn't distracted. She'd
            finally whipped me with a scissor-lock. I was trapped with
            my head between her thighs, looking up into the tight crotch
            of her shorts.

                  "Give? Give?" she chanted.

                  "Never!  Not on your life," I insisted.  Give up?
            Heck, I wanted some more time so close to her secret girl
            spot.  Reaching around her bare thigh, I tried to insert my
            hands between her legs near the stretched bottom of her
            white shorts. I'd already made out that all she had on were
            short shorts and panties glimpsed under a too-large, baggy
            sweat shirt.

                  Making a tickling sound as I touched the inside of her
            thigh, I got her laughing a moment, relaxing her strong leg
            muscles.  I lunged-- not back and away-- rather, I pushed my
            head in and higher up, bringing my nose right up to her
            bottom.

                  "Now I really gotcha," she chortled.  "Give?"

                  Got me?  I smiled to myself. Who's got whom here?
            "Never!" I mumbled from the confines of her sweaty crotch,
            inhaling her smell, the sexy, girl aroma.

                  Smelling her panties that I'd snitched from the soiled
            clothes hamper was always a turn-on, but smelling her this
            closely, in real-time, was almost overpowering.  I forgot to
            struggle and gave myself over to the erotic moment. Seeing
            the leg of her panties under her shorts, a few light brown
            hairs sticking out, I wondered, has she any idea what I'm
            seeing?

                  Jean suspected something was going on.  "What are you
            *doing*, you little shit?"  And then she shrieked as I began
            to run my finger tips under the pant leg, touching her panty
            crotch, all in the guise of tickling.

                  "Tickle, tickle, tickle," I lied, trying to make my
            mind work on two separate levels.  Pretend we're wrestling,
            but bury my nose in her crotch.  I was desperate to smell
            her, to touch her, to see her sex and I didn't really know
            how to go about it...other than this game.

                  Still shrieking with laughter and repeating,
            "No...no...no . . . ," she was trying to keep me pinned and
            get away from my tickling at the same time.  "Oh, God,
            don't.  I'll wet myself.  Stop.  Please stop."

                  Wet herself?  What did she mean?  It was then that I
            became aware of another smell, the unmistakable faint scent
            of pee.  Cripes, was she peeing in her pants?  Craning my
            head back, I attempted to look at the white crotch right in
            front of my face and could see a wet place as big as a plum.
            Then, before I could see anymore, she quickly disengaged and
            ran from the room, slamming the bathroom door behind her.

                  As I'd often done in the past when I knew we were
            alone, I'd listen at the thin bathroom door.  Once again I
            heard the familiar hissing of her pee hitting the porcelain
            bowl.  Other times she'd make a louder noise when her
            squirting pee splashed in the water and I couldn't figure
            out why it changed from time to time.  Did she sit
            differently?  Could she really aim it? I didn't hear the
            noisy toilet paper roll as I anticipated.  Rather, it was
            quiet. Straining, I imagined I could hear her breathing, but
            it may have been me. After several minutes of silence, I
            then heard her pull on the toilet paper, a long pull
            followed by another short silence.

                  The bathroom door knob rattled, surprising me, for
            she'd not flushed the john.  She *always* flushed -- that
            was my signal to get out of there. Oh, shit!  I'm caught, I
            thought, my heart suddenly in my throat.  Yet, she'd paused
            just a moment, allowing me to scamper away. Then the door
            opened with a bang and Jean, walking out of the bathroom,
            stepped over me.  I could see the half moons of her ass
            cheeks as she stepped over my upturned face.  She simply
            dismissed me with a casual, "Jerk!"

                  As she rounded the corner and passed from sight, I
            jumped up and went into the bathroom.   The lid was up on
            the john and when I looked in I was thrilled to see pale
            yellow water and a folded-up wad of toilet tissue. There it
            is, I thought.  There's her pee!  I stood looking at it,
            thinking about how it got there and I just couldn't not jack
            off.  I was too primed, I was ready to explode with sexual
            tension.  It must have taken about ten seconds of
            frantically stroking my teen-aged hard-on for me to squirt
            my jism into the yellow toilet water.  That's it.  I was
            hooked.  My sister had me by the balls on a downhill drag
            and she didn't even know it.  Jean's panties and Jean's
            peeing, at that moment, became firmly linked in my mind with
            an immense sexual charge.

                  Later, I tried to talk with her about our wrestling but
            I wasn't surprised when she just wouldn't talk about it at
            all.  Still, we both knew something had changed and a new
            tension, a sexual charge, had been established.  For me, I
            became obsessed with trying to see Jean naked, or up her
            dress or under a pantleg.  If that's all you think about and
            you live in such closeness with another person, the rewards
            are frequent.  Yet, looking was one thing, but not enough.
            I wanted to up the ante.  I wanted so much to smell her
            again and more, I wanted to talk with her about it! I just
            wanted to talk dirty.  And heaven knows, I wanted to watch
            her pee.

                  She rarely got to go to the john without me being aware
            of it and listening at the door.  The sound of her peeing
            was an aphrodisiac for me --instant woody!  Even the muffled
            sound of her soft farts gave me a thrill.  I came to know
            her micturition habits born of the certainty of long
            experience.

                  For me, a ritual was established.  After school, Jean
            would always change her clothes including her underwear,
            leaving the soiled garments in the bathroom hamper.  As soon
            as she'd come out, I'd go in, lock the door, and fish out
            her panties.  Then, with my own pants down around my ankles
            and sitting on the toilet, I sniffed her panties as I played
            with myself.  It had been years since I'd caught a glimpse
            of her bare pussy, but my active imagination played that
            tape over and over, seeing the pussy hair and her
            little-girl slit slowly open, the lips swelling and moist.
            With my nose close to the odor of her "private place," I
            smelled the heady scent of her sex.  I beat off every day,
            often twice, trying to think of a way that I could get Jean
            to play with me.

                  She'd become increasingly aware of my voyeuristic play
            over the weeks and pretended indignation when I tried to
            look up her dress, but I sensed her stance was more pro
            forma than real.  Else why did she sit so carelessly when I
            was around?  Why did she bend over in front of me so often
            the tight crotch of her shorts pulled up into the crack of
            her ass and then ask me some nonsense question that I might
            look her way?   She sure didn't act that way when Mom was
            around.

                  Still, I knew her "rules"-- the rules of our
            household-- don't talk about it.  We could play the game and
            pretend we weren't doing anything, but we couldn't openly
            acknowledge it.  She might sit carelessly, reading a book,
            and I might sit on the floor in front of her,
            surreptitiously watching the junction of her thighs and
            catching a peek of her panties...but I couldn't openly let
            her know I was doing this. That angered her -- me drawing
            attention to my interest in looking up her dress.  It was
            part of this teenaged seduction, part of our forbidden
            incestuous play...pretend it isn't really happening.

                  Much later, Jean was to tell me that she knew exactly
            what she was doing and what I was doing.  She was very
            aware, very excited and more, thrilled and scared at the
            same time.  She wanted to escalate the game herself, but it
            just had to be in a way she could square with her
            hypertrophied sense of morality...it just isn't so if you
            don't admit it.

                  So, if we couldn't openly own up to our kinks, we could
            beat around the bush (as it were) and teasingly approach our
            horniness.  At that time, I didn't know that Jean wanted to
            play as much as I did.  I thought the burden of seduction,
            of guile, was mostly upon me.  And, functionally, most of it
            was.  Like so many boys, I thought I was the only one who
            was this sick.  I was the only one who hung around the
            bathroom door or sniffed their sister's underwear and then
            had wet dreams about it. Cripes!

                  Clearly, I needed a plan.  I just couldn't wait around
            forever.  I suppose I had the typical teenager's impaired
            tolerance for delayed gratification.  I needed something
            more direct, less subtle... something to address the topic
            in a frontal fashion, yet maintain the denial.  Her
            underpants were the key to this, I thought.  She knew, I
            suspected, that I played with them in the bathroom, but the
            secrecy of my masturbation habits didn't allow the
            eye-to-eye confrontation I wanted.  Time to crank up the
            intimacy rheostat. I'll somehow use her panties as a tool of
            seduction.

                  Think about it for a moment.  Panties.  They've
            *always* carried a charge.  Girls giggle about them and boys
            have an unflagging interest in them.  They're secret.
            They're naughty.  And they're sexy as all get out. They're
            worn right next to "that place."  They get "dirty" with . .
            . you know, those things kids don't talk about
            easily...pee... pussy juice...skid marks.  My sister Jean
            *knew * of my horny fascination with her undergarments, both
            on her as well as in the dirty-clothes hamper, so they'd be
            a natural, I reasoned.  Further, it wouldn't be too far out
            --  not like just out-and-out grabbing her as I'd really
            like -- and I could retreat if she was really offended.  (I
            was limited in the cojones department as a kid, that's
            clear.)  Thus, my need for an oblique scheme.


                  Now, back to the soiled panties: Spreading the crotch
            of her white cotton underpants over the palm of my left hand
            and examining them obliquely to the light, I asked, "Is this
            a spot of pee I see?  Did you pee in your panties, Jean?
            Did you have a little accident, big sister? Did you..."

                  Whop!  Something hit me in the face.  She'd thrown the
            first thing that fell to her hand, thrown and hit me right
            in the face, with -- you guessed it -- another pair of her
            panties!

                  Pulling them from my face as I staggered back in a
            theatrical fashion, I looked at them.  These were pink rayon
            with lace around the top and the legs.  "Oh, do you want me
            to do a crotch check on these as well?"

                  She went ballistic.  "You rat.  You stinking, little
            rat.  You're sick. You're a twisted little shit of a brother
            and I wish you'd fall into the toilet and be washed out to
            the dump and I'd never see you again and I'd get your room
            and I wouldn't have to wait forever for the bathroom while
            you..." Red-faced and sputtering, she leaned across the
            folding table to grab her panties from me.  Her shirt front
            fell away.

                  As part of her Saturday, stay-at-home,
            no-one-will-see-me uniform, she was wearing one of my old,
            baggy and stretched, sweat shirts. Perhaps because we were
            doing the wash, and it was a Saturday when no one was
            around, she'd not worn a bra.  I could see her tits!  Down
            the gaping front of that sweat shirt, I could see all of her
            tits and her front, right down to her belly button.  Her
            breasts were medium-sized and her nipples were large and
            erect.  I can see them in my mind's eye yet today.  Bending
            over the table, her arm outstretched, blushing and angry,
            her white breasts swayed.  At that moment, they weren't the
            breasts of a young, teenaged girl; they were the breasts of
            a sexual woman and I wanted to touch them! There was
            silence.  I don't know how long it lasted...seemed like long
            minutes.  Jean, looking into my eyes, angry, hurt, confused
            and yes, aroused.  I'm holding her panties and looking down
            her shirt, mesmerized by her breasts, by her nipples. I
            stared.  I stared and didn't say anything.

                  I was acutely aware of my cock.  It was hard.  Hard and
            pressing into the edge of the table, bent in my pants and
            hurting a little. Unbidden, my hips pushed into the table
            harder, pushing my hard-on sideways, the tip of my dick
            suddenly springing up toward my belt.  Now I was
            unconsciously dry humping the damn table, holding Jean's
            panties and staring at her tits. Nothing subtle here.  I was
            trying to fuck the damn changing table and couldn't stop.
            Didn't want to stop.

                  Following my eyes, Jean looked down and saw her own
            breasts, fully exposed.  With a sudden inrush of breath, she
            slapped her hand over her shirt, closing the top.  At the
            same moment, I extended my hand to her with her panties, as
            if to give them up.  Falling for that, she reached for them,
            pulling her hand away and the shirt fell open again. And
            again, I could plainly see her bare boobs with their very
            prominent, eraser nipples.

                  Still grinding my cock against the hard table edge and
            watching her breasts sway as she stretched farther to get
            her panties, I pulled back a little, just out of her reach.
            And again, time was frozen.  Her breasts, now pink in the
            wave of her blooming embarrassment, were there in front of
            me, one slightly flattened against the table by her chest as
            she leaned across, the other swaying free, the nipple
            prominently erect. I humped still and she looked.  Just
            looked and looked.  The only sound was our breathing.  Both
            of us, I think, were mesmerized by the erotic charge of what
            was happening, and we didn't even really know *what* was
            happening.

                  My world narrowed.  Through slitted eyes I could see
            only her breast. As down a tunnel, her voice came to me in a
            hoarse whisper, "Billy, you're doin' it, aren't you...you're
            doin' it and you're gonna come, huh?"

                  I heard her but I didn't.  It was too late.  I was gone
            and it never occurred to me to even attempt to slow this
            runaway avalanche of feeling. It began somewhere deep
            inside, gathering force and rumbled up and a core of heat
            poured out my cock in near-painful pulses, once, twice, a
            third and then a fourth spurt.  I came, spurting jet after
            jet inside my Jockeys and the jism pooled and ran back down
            the shaft of my cock, the warmth of my come bathing my dick
            down to the root.

                  The roaring in my ears quieted.  Dimly I heard the hum
            of the refrigerator and then a car passing on the street.
            Then my own breath, gasping.  Opening my eyes I saw Jean.
            She hadn't moved.  Her eyes were wide open in astonishment,
            her mouth slack.  I could see her tongue behind her lower
            teeth and still, her nipple, now almost purple against the
            white background of her belly.

                  Caught in the terrible intensity of this unplanned
            erotic high, we stood watching each other for a long minute.
            Embarrassment began to flood my feelings.  What had I done?
            How had this happened?  I never planned this. What would
            Jean think?  Worse, what would she tell Mom and Dad, or her
            girl friends?  Suddenly, I was no longer horny.  I was
            scared shitless!

                  I looked away and then, as if it had broken a spell,
            Jean spun away, muttering, "Ho-ly shit!"  I stood there
            alone with her panties in my hand, still pressed up against
            the table, my cock wilting.  Was I in for it?

                  My mind raced.  Well I might be 'in for it,' but what's
            done is done, I reasoned.  I'm not going to turn back now.
            It'd be hard to make it much worse and she just *might* be
            turned on too, I reasoned. Gaining some shred of self
            confidence, I decided to press any advantage I might have.

                  For some obscure reason, I decided that it was unlikely
            she'd tell on me. For one, she'd be too embarrassed.  And
            for two, I thought she just might be a little excited
            herself.

                  Knowing she'd want to be "offended" for a little while,
            I gave her space and just smiled when she tried to brush me
            off.  While she was a little bigger than me (then), with the
            instinctual certainty of the horny hunter, I knew she wasn't
            as sure of herself and that she needed to be chased, to be
            talked into being naughty.  Well, I was just the guy.