Theoretical Killings: Essays & Accidents Book

I was quietly moved by this collection, which I found to be very different from Vonnegut's better known works. For one thing, there's virtually no science fiction. For another, there's virtually no humor. Instead there are short stories in the vein of historical fiction, primarily focused on World War 2, each one crafted with care, each showing the folly of war. Each story is simple but potent. Since my own words seem too small to properly address the strength of Vonnegut's, I instead offer a parable from The Principia Discordia. (Vonnegut has been canonized as a Discordian saint, Second Class, a lower rank than his own creation Saint Bokonon - a Brigadier Saint - fictional characters of course being more capable of perfection than their real-life counterparts)



A SERMON ON ETHICS AND LOVE

One day Mal-2 asked the messenger spirit Saint Gulik to approach the Goddess and request Her presence for some desperate advice. Shortly afterwards the radio came on by itself, and an ethereal female Voice said YES?

"O! Eris! Blessed Mother of Man! Queen of Chaos! Daughter of Discord! Concubine of Confusion! O! Exquisite Lady, I beseech You to lift a heavy burden from my heart!"

WHAT BOTHERS YOU, MAL? YOU DON'T SOUND WELL.

"I am filled with fear and tormented with terrible visions of pain. Everywhere people are hurting one another, the planet is rampant with injustices, whole societies plunder groups of their own people, mothers imprison sons, children perish while brothers war. O, woe."

WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THAT, IF IT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DO?

"But nobody wants it! Everybody hates it."

OH. WELL, THEN STOP.

At which moment She turned herself into an aspirin commercial and left The Polyfather stranded alone with his species.