The Grave Gourmet Book

I liked the idea, but the execution? Ugh!

The first, most important thing Campion has to say about Capucine is that she's gorgeous and knows it. She first appears in chapter one in "straightening, drawing in her tummy, rounding out her buttocks, lifting her breasts against her designer silk blouse." By the second chapter, she is asking her superior for a job transfer, still wearing designer clothes, but having decided that "omitting a bra was essential to the tough guy look." For some reason, Campion feels the need to mention her braless state twice within three pages. Am I supposed to like this woman? I'm honestly not sure.

And then there is the prose. French words are liberally scattered throughout the text, just to remind everyone that this is supposed to be France. They're italicized, to remind us that they're foreign (Yes, I know this is traditional, but it's also distracting, especially when it's happening several times a page).

Then there are the metaphors. Oh the metaphors.

In the first chapter, Capucine's "feeling of well-being popped like a soap bubble, drenching her in cold oily dampness." A few pages later, there is Capucine "releasing an insuppressible smile to flutter across the room like a butterfly."

I hope someone opened a window for the poor thing.

Having made it to all of page eleven, I flipped to the end, only to find someone saying, "My sense is she's cauterizing her spirit."

This may well replace "I left my fear in the dimensional tunnel" as a personal favorite non-phrase(1), but I'm still not finishing the book.

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(1) From Andromeda, about the time I realized it had stopped being the show I loved. Still, I've gotten a lot of amusement out of that phrase. That's something.

Note: Originally written as part of a multi-book review over at my blog, Bookwyrme's Lair