Survival Notes for Graduates: Inspiration for the Ultimate Journey Book

	Introduction	13
1.	The Edge of Graduation	15
2.	How to Be Free of Your Parents	17
3.	What to Cry Over	19
4.	When Will You Meet Your Real Love?	21
5.	Fake IDs	23
6.	How to Be Fat as a Cow and Happy	25
7.	Beware of Materialism's Lure	27
8.	Carrying the Luggage of Guilt	29
9.	Have You Heard?	31
10.	Keeping Your Clothes On	33
11.	Great Beauty Tips	35
12.	The Stench of Your Present Crisis	37
13.	Stick Your Past Where the Sun Don't Shine	39
14.	How Not to Be Alone	41
15.	How to Keep From Barfing	43
16.	Killing the Pain of Time	45
17.	How to Hit the Lottery	47
18.	Getting a Stranglehold on Your Dreams	49
19.	How to Go on a Low-Fat Money Diet	51
20.	Bargain Alert! 50% Off Everything in the Store	53
21.	Where to Hide When It's All Too Much	55
22.	Keeping It Real	57
23.	Why We're Here	59
24.	Your Untold Story	61
25.	Trading Spaces: Your Bedroom for the Dorm	63
26.	How to Keep Yourself Motivated	65
27.	So You Feel Trapped--Things Will Change	67
28.	Hungry Enough to Eat a Horse	69
29.	Mirror, Mirror on the Wall	71
30.	Interpreting Dog Dreams	73
31.	Blogging down the Bones	75
32.	Overcoming the Fear That Binds You	77
33.	Mortifying Moments	79
34.	When You Hit a Wall	81
35.	Don't Get Ahead of God	83
36.	Attitude Check	85
37.	To an Unknown God	87
38.	How to Induce Psychosis in a Rat	89
39.	Swine Dives Prohibited	91
40.	What to Do When You Are Heartbroken	93
41.	Is It Okay to Be Jealous?	95
42.	Keep On Keeping On	97
43.	What to Look for in a Relationship	99
44.	Stress Eating	101
45.	Don't Get Stuck on Yourself	103
46.	Closed Doors Can Become Windows of Opportunity	105
47.	Can You Hear Me Now?	107
48.	How to Find Your Smile	109
49.	Taking Down the "Do Not Disturb" Sign	111
50.	Dealing with Disappointment	113
51.	Mistakes Need Not Be Fatal	115
52.	Why You Should Throw Away the First Two-Years of College	117
53.	Mom's a Control Freak!	119
54.	Butt Out!	121
55.	Soul Hurricanes	123
56.	God Is More Than Pie-in-the-Sky	125
57.	A Staggering Drunk	127
58.	What We Can Learn from Braveheart	129
59.	Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda	131
60.	If Tears Were Shooting Stars	133
61.	How Embarrassing!	135
62.	Homesick Blues	137
63.	Don't Cry over Spilt Milk	139
64.	Dirty Little Thoughts	141
65.	Top Five Relationship Fixers	143
66.	What CoverGirl Can't Cover	145
67.	Enduring the Job That Stinks	147
68.	How to Deal with a Drama Queen	149
69.	Don't Get Caught with Your Pants Down	151
70.	The Famous Last Words of a Redneck: "Watch This!"	153
71.	Playing Jesus to the Lepers in Your Head	155
72.	Facing Shame	157
73.	Living in the Paparazzi's Shutter	159
74.	Fishing for a Date, Not a Lover	161
75.	Taking Sides in Parental Disagreements	163
76.	As Seen on Religious Television	165
77.	Why God Will Never Turn His Back on You	167
78.	You Can Whip This Class without No-Doz	169
79.	Finding Your Honey and Eating It Too	171
80.	Never Thin Enough	173
81.	Kicking the Dog	175
82.	What's on Your Horizon?	177
83.	Don't Wish Your Life Away	179
84.	Finding the End of Ourselves	181
85.	California or Bust!	183
86.	What You Can Learn from Jack and Jill	185
87.	Find Someone Who Can Tell You the Truth	187
88.	Getting Back to Normal	189
89.	What Your Parents Never Want You to Know	191
90.	Life on Cloud 9	193
91.	Why the Prayer of Jabez May Cause Hair Loss	195
92.	Long-Distance Relationships	197
93.	The Cinderella Syndrome	199
94.	A Shipwreck on the Sheets	201
95.	The Things That Drop in Your Lap	203
96.	Wake-up Call #49	205
97.	Getting What You Want	207
98.	How to Fit In	209
99.	21 Grams of Soul	211
100.	It All Goes Back in the Box	213