Philosophy of Qi:the Record of Great Doubts The Record of Great Doubts Book

[A concourse in Athens. ION, SOCRATES, a PASSER-BY]

ION : Hi Socrates.

SOCRATES : What, you again? After the comprehensive verbal trouncing you received yesterday?

ION: Yeah, well, like I’ve thought about it some more. Wanna try a re-run?

SOCRATES: If that is what you wish. Where shall we start?

ION: Okay, we’ll skip the intro. For the benefit of people just joining our program, I am a rhapsode, that’s a kind of dramatic reciter of poetry, and I specialize in Homer. I told Socrates that I’m really good at interpreting Homer, like, better than anyone else I know, but other poets just make me go to sleep. And he started telling me that didn’t make sense and got me all confused.

SOCRATES: I only question. You got yourself confused, young Ion—

ION: Whatever. Let’s start at the bit with the leaden plummet. Okay?

SOCRATES: By all means. And when Homer says, “And she descended into the deep like a leaden plummet, which, set in the horn of ox that ranges in the fields, rushes along carrying death among the ravenous fishes” - will the art of the fisherman or of the rhapsode be better able to judge whether these lines are rightly expressed or not?

ION: That’s it. Well, yesterday I answered like a complete dork that it was the fisherman. I’d like to change my mind.

SOCRATES: You now aver that it is the rhapsode?

ION: See, I went and talked to one of my rhapsode friends who specializes in J.K. Rowling. And I tried out your arguments on him, I said, when J.K. describes Harry’s first encounter with platform 9¾, who will understand it best, you or the railway buff? And he said, me of course, it’s a fictitious incident that has nothing to do with the real architecture of Kings Cross Station. It’s all about the Potterverse, on which I’m a renowned expert whose blog is followed by—

SOCRATES: I fear, as usual, that my understanding is insufficient to grasp all the subtle points you make. Had I but been able to afford that 50 drachma course in sophistry! Nonetheless, if I grasp your meaning aright, you say that your knowledge of Homer is the essential thing, not anything about the technicalities of fishing.

ION: Exactly.

SOCRATES: Because Homer is using fishing in a poetic sense, rather than giving a lesson in how to maximize your catch?

ION: Quite so.

SOCRATES: Well, you might have a point there.

ION: So you’ll now concede that appreciation of poetry isn’t a mystic art, but just a matter of developing a good knowledge of the source material?

SOCRATES: Oh, I don’t know about that. Tell you what. I’ll give you this round, and then let’s make it best of three. With a doubled stake.

ION: You’re on.

PASSER-BY: [sotto voce] Sucker.