Dating, Mating, and Manhandling : The Ornithological Guide to Men Book

	Introduction	1
Part i	Dating
1	Get Flocked: Discovering the Fundamentals of Flirting	7
2	The Art of Flirting	11
3	Assembling Your Mantrap Pack	21
4	Sitting Ducks: The 18 Most Likely Places to Spot Your Bird	25
5	Flirting in the Field	34
6	Get Your Ducks in a Row	39
7	Male Courtship Displays	44
8	Strutting	47
9	Etiquette in the Aviary: First Date Dos and Don'ts	51
10	Bewitching Your Bird: Tools of the Trade for a Great First Date	55
11	Date Interrogation	63
12	Clay Pigeons	71
13	Lovebirds' Field Notes Checklist: Was He Winging It?	77
Part ii	Mating
14	Bird Selection	89
15	Don't Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch! The Heartache Prevention Handbook	99
16	Flock Consciousness in the Field	112
17	The Birds and the Bees	122
18	Sex and the Single Bird	131
19	Male Breeding Displays	134
20	Flight Patterns	144
21	The Male Secret Language Decoder	153
22	Has Your Relationship Gone to the Birds?	162
23	Flipping the Bird	171
24	The Pterodactyl	176
Part iii	Manhandling
25	Can You Train This Bird?	185
26	Birdshit	188
27	Talk to the Animals	194
28	Peckerheads	205
29	Putting All Your Eggs in One Basket	214
30	Swan Songs: Delivering the Timely Ultimatum	221
Appendix	An Index of Bird Types: The Aviary	227