Autobiography of red Book

"Sometimes a journey makes itself necessary."
Anne Carson ~~ Autobiography of Red


Anne Carson's Autobiography Of Red took my breath away. I don't think I've felt this way about a book since I first discovered Virginia Woolf. I was stunned by Carson's poetic novel.

Autobiography Of Red is packed with so many emotions, perhaps the most glaring is Geryon ~~ the protagonist's ~~ continual struggle with loneliness and loss ~~ something I can relate to all to well. From an early age, Geryon must deal with a great loss that would devastate any child ~~ the loss of a parent. While Carson doesn't provide much insight, it's implied that Geryon's mother and father are not together. "Every second Tuesday in winter Geryon's father and brother went to hockey practice. / Geryon and his mother had supper alone". Not only is Geryon without a father figure in the household, but also, it seems that Geryon does not see his father at all, as the brother does. This would be difficult for any child to cope with.



This creates a feeling of loss and loneliness that permeates the entire house. Geryon and his mother eat supper alone; while their mother works, Geryon and his brother are babysat. Autobiography Of Red is full of moments when Geryon completely experiences loneliness. In a loss of innocence and trust, his brother molests him ~~ and there is nothing he can do nothing about it ~~ he's afraid to go to his mother, and his father's nowhere to be see - this leaves Geryon feeling even more isolated and alone. When Geryon and his mother are alone in the house, they turn on all the lights in every room ~~ even in the rooms they have no intention of being in. Why? Well, it's a defense against desolation. Turning on all the lights makes them feel less alone. Fear is equated with darkness in this world. In this world even the empty fruit bowl is equated with loneliness.

But, Geryon's journey is also a journey of self-awareness, discovery, and acceptance. The entire novel concerns itself with the battle between inside versus outside ~~ physically, spiritually, sexually, literally, and metaphorically. Geryon's early life is built around his inner world rather than the world around him. He is the opposite of most children.

Geryon's world changes drastically when he's becomes a love struck adolescent. Like all of us, puberty alters Geryon's outlook in magical ways. After befriending, and falling in love with Herakles, Geryon begins to live outside of himself ~~ even the scenes shift from inside to outside. When Geryon visits Herakles' house they spend their time outside on the lawn or the back porch. Together they take road trips together. As Geryon becomes more involved with Herakles, he inhabits the outside world. Our hero is no longer lonely.



Subsequently, when Geryon and Herakles separate, we initially see Geryon slide backwards into his old self. He returns home to his mother. Their home is now filled with tension. With Herakles no longer in the picture, Geryon experiences a crisis like none he's ever known before. He now needs to know who he is. This is a far cry from the inner world Geryon experienced as a boy ~~ before he came to begin accepting himself. Now that he's aware of his desires, and sexual orientation, he can no longer hide himself from the world.

Years later Geryon comes across Herakles on a trip to Argentina. Herakles' new lover Ancash forms the third point of a love triangle. The novel ends, ambiguously, with Geryon, Ancash, and Herakles stopping outside a ...

At last, Geryon is transformed. He's less self-loathing, less depressed, not fully satisfied, but having experienced and learned so much; from philosophers and photography and lovers, from receiving whooping from Herakles' current lover, Ancash, to accepting himself for who and what he is, he finally chooses to live.

In the end, I have to agree with Alice Munro. "This book is amazing-I haven't discovered any writing in years so marvelously disturbing."