Why Men Want Sex and Women Need Love: Solving the Mystery of Attraction Book

Acknowledgments v

Introduction 1

Looking for "the One" 3

How the Western World Got So Screwed Up About Sex 5

The Statistics 7

1 Sex on the Brain 9

Same Goals, Different Agendas 10

The Power of Love 12

The Biology of Love 13

Love At First Sight 14

Darwin Made Me Do It 14

Let's Stick Together 15

Why Lovers Are So Crazy About Each Other 17

I Get a Shiver Down My Backbone 18

I Can't Sleep, I Can't Eat 19

What Brain Scans Reveal 20

Might as Well Face It, You're Addicted co Love 21

The Geography of Sex and Love in the Brain 22

Why Men and Women See Love Differently 24

How Men's Brains Rate Attractiveness in Women 25

How Women's Brains Rate Attractiveness in Men 26

Why Lust Doesn't Last 28

What Happens When You Get Dumped 30

Summary 31

2 Straight Talk on Sex and Love 33

How Times Have Changed 34

How Humans Are Now Studied 36

Why Being Loved and Being in Love Are So Important 37

The Seven Types of Love 40

Our Love Maps 41

How Hollywood and the Media Color Our View 42

Why the Twenty-First Century Is Harder for Men 44

Summary 46

3 What Women Really Want 47

The Changing Needs of Women 48

Mamma Told Me, "Shop Around" 49

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun 51

The Truth About What Women Want 53

Wealthy Men Give Women More Orgasms 56

The Top Five Things Women Want from Men 57

Commitment-Why a Man Should Give a Woman an Impressive Ring 65

The Last Ten Things a Woman Would Ever Say 67

Seven Simple Things Women Find Attractive In Men 67

Why No Woman Wants a Loser 71

Women Will Always Want Resources 72

Summary 72

4 What Men Really Want 74

How the Media Shape Men's Views 76

What Men Really Want 79

What a Man Will Do forSex 80

Men Don't Think About Relationships 81

Decoding Manspeak 83

Men Seek Reproductive Value 85

Getting to the Point 87

What the Personal Columns Reveal 89

Why Attractiveness Has Become So Important 90

What "Attractive" Means 92

Take a Leaf from the Amazons 93

What Men Look for in Beauty 93

Our Universal Beauty Contest 95

Our Reaction to Attractive Faces Is Inborn 95

What Turns Men On-the 70% Hips-to-Waist Ratio 96

What Turns Men Off About Women 97

Physical Choices for Gay Men and Women 98

How Governments Have Become the New Husband 99

Summary 99

5 Wanted: Meaningful Overnight Relationship-Casual Sex 102

What Is Casual Sex? 104

A Definition of "Sexual Relationship" 106

Why We Have Casual Sex 108

How We Feel After Casual Sex 111

How Dads Influence Their Kids' Attitudes 112

How Many Partners Do You Want? 112

Sexual Fantasies and Casual Sex 113

How Gay Men and Women Look at Things 115

Summary 116

6 Your Place or Mine? Affairs and Cheating 117

What Is an Affair? 119

Your Cheating Heart 120

Why Affairs Happen 123

It Can Happen at Any Level 125

Why Women Play Around Less Than Men 126

Six Common Myths About Cheating 127

The Nine Different Types of Affairs 129

Why the "Perfect Affair" Is a Fantasy 133

I Heard It Through the Grapevine 134

Eight Classic Signs of a Cheater 134

How to Handle a Cheater 137

Getting Things Right 140

A Guide to Recovery After an Affair 140

Four Vital Strategies to Avoid Becoming a Cheater Yourself 142

Summary 142

7 How to Find the Right Partner(s)-the Mating Rating Quiz 144

How Most Relationships Start 144

Matching with the Right Partner 146

Core Values and Beliefs 147

The Five Most Common "New-Relationship" Mistakes 148

The Mating Rating 150

The Mating Rating Quiz-How Do You Measure Up In the Marketplace? 153

How to Find a Great Partner 165

How to Change Your Love Life Forever 166

How to Play the Numbers Game with Your List 170

Who You Should Avoid 173

Clues About Mr./Ms. Wrong 174

When the Chemistry Is Wrong 175

The 9% Rule 176

Summary 177

8 Fifteen Mysteries About Men That Women Don't Understand 179

1 Why Men Wake Up in the Morning with an Erection 180

2 Why Sex Can Be Just Sex for Men 181

3 The Nothing Room 182

4 Why Men Are Obsessed with Women's Breasts 183

5 Why Men Won't Tell the Truth to Women About Sex 184

6 Why Men Love Curvy Women 188

7 Why the G-Spot Is Like a UFO 189

8 Why It's So Important to Men for Women to Initiate Sex 189

9 Why Men Get It So Wrong in Nightclubs 190

10 When Is a Man Ready for Commitment or Marriage? 191

11 Why Mature Men Wear Speedos in Public or Proudly Display a Potbelly 193

12 Men and Their Fetishes 194

13 What Men Worry About 195

14 Why Men Have Difficulty Saying 'I Love You' 196

15 The Top Five Questions That Frighten Most Men 197

9 Twelve Truths About Women Most Men Don't Know 200

1 What Women Want from Sex 201

2 Why Women So Rarely Initiate Sex 204

3 How to Make Women Want Sex More Often 206

4 Why Women Have Orgasms 209

5 Why Smart Women Are Often Fools in Love 210

6 Why Women Prefer Older Men 210

7 Why Women Want to Be Touched 211

8 Why Women Seem Distracted During Sex 213

9 How Women Perceive Sexual Aggression 214

10 How Women View Sexual Harassment 214

11 Why Women Fantasize About Bad, Bad Men 216

12 Why So Many Women Prefer Chocolate to Sex 216

Summary 217

10 Thirteen Tactics That Can Improve Your Mating Rating 219

Eight Things Men Can Do to Improve Their Rating with Women 219

How Men Criticize the Competition 226

Five Things Women Can Do to Increase Their Mating Rating 226

How Women Criticize the Competition 232

11 A Happier Future Together? 234

Married People Are Now the Minority 236

Are Today's Youth More Informed? 237

Why New Love Always Seems So Promising 238

We Are Definitely Differenr 239

Do Opposites Really Attract? 241

The World's Worst Lovers 242

How Women In Other Countries View Sex 243

Who Is Missing Out? 244

Put Your Finger on Your Sex Drive and Success 245

The Science of Future Love 248

Sniffing Out a Good Partner 249

Ten Reasons Why Sex Is Good Medicine 250

How So Many Were Fooled 251

Who Gets Who? 252

Why Evolution Is Probably Over 253

When to Discuss Problems 254

Summary 255

References 259